She pays for friends

http://www.laineygossip.com/She-pays-for-friends-blind-riddle/39824

Since this is coming off a Taylor Swift post, let me clarify off the top now: this is not about Taylor Swift. Or anyone who hangs out with Taylor Swift – at least not yet. You need to go more down market.

At the beginning of her career, this one did have friends. They’d room together, audition together. And then, one by one, all the friends slowly, carefully stepped away from the crazy. And the sabotage. Once, before a meeting, she told a friend of hers that she was happy for her that she was reading for a part, because it meant that the producers were looking for someone “plain” and that she totally deserved that opportunity to shine. You remember the gossip urban legend about Gwyneth Paltrow seeing the script for Shakespeare In Love on Winona Ryder’s coffee table? Well, this is real life. This one would obsessively stay on top of all the jobs her friends were up for and ride along too. Then, if the opportunity came up, she’d backstab the friends’ skills, talent, commitment, even on occasions when she wasn’t even right for the role. For her, it was unthinkable that anyone else make it before she did. When she did finally make it, although she wasn’t the first choice for her now-hit show, the paranoia about what she’d done to others took over. She accused them of talking sh-t about her and demanded to see their emails. She’d invite them to parties but then piss on them in the bathroom for using her to get face time with industry executives. She’s spread rumours about the prettiest of her friends – they were on drugs, they were unclean – to make sure that they’d never overshadow her. So it’s no surprise that there are none left. The only constant in her life is her partner who she keeps from everyone else because she doesn’t want them moving in on her territory.

But lately she’s been noticing that the gossip media focuses on friendships – not just Taylor Swift but Gwyneth and Reese and Jennifer Aniston and the family that Kanye West married into …everyone in Hollywood has their own club. She wants to be part of a club. No one wants her to be in their club. She had to buy her club. She’s paid 3 or 4 women, none of them with her level of recognition, to start hanging out with her. So when you see her at dinner, surrounded by women as she’s leaving the restaurant? If they show up on Instagram and Twitter? Those people are literally employees. Until of course they become too popular.

June 17, 2015 at 9:22 AM

Update (6/17/15):
denial 1: Taylor Swift
denial 2: Jennifer Lawrence
denial 3: Sarah Hyland & Nina Dobrev

She pays for friends

Her only challenge

http://www.laineygossip.com/Her-only-challenge-blind-riddle/30857

She’s a girl who gets what she wants, sometimes much to our surprise, especially when it comes to romance. But you can’t game your way to a baby. And right now, she really, really wants a baby. She’s young. She’s healthy. She’s resourceful. In her mind, it should have happened by now. But, as of six weeks ago, she wasn’t pregnant. So this is her only conversation. She’s been asking for tips. She’s been asking almost everyone she talks to for tips – how did you get pregnant, what were you eating, what were you drinking, what position, what time of the month, what time of the day, etc, etc, etc…

And ordinarily, for people who find themselves in this situation, there’s a lot of sympathy, a lot of goodwill. Because, as Sasha answered earlier this year, no one wants to see someone struggling to start a family.

In her case however…

Well…

She’s not as popular as you might think she is. I mean, maybe among the privileged and the elite, but to those who have to work with her, or for her, she’s not as sweet and perfect as we’ve been led to believe. Everyone’s schedule has to accommodate her schedule. Every schedule has to change at the last minute for her schedule, ironically even if others have children of their own to manage and to look after. One source even said to me, “Why should I have to rearrange my kids’ daycare because she’s ovulating?”

On other projects, she’s not great at taking feedback. When someone disagrees with her, she tells them to their face that she’s reconsidering their job status. When it turns out that they were right to begin with, she’s the type to blame them for not being assertive enough. Some of her staff members have joked that it’s an initiation ritual to have her hang up on them. And she’s also really sh-tty about overtime. If someone’s been working out of their mind to make her unrealistic deadlines, she’ll then question them about how much pay she’s owed to them in return, either suggesting that they’re lying about how hard they worked, or implying that they might not be cut out for it since it took them so long to get it done.

Loyalty is starting to become a problem. Because if they’re not loyal, not only will they not stay, they’ll also start talking. They’ve started talking already.

July 28, 2014 at 6:24 AM

Her only challenge

Nanny Diaries

http://www.laineygossip.com/Nanny-Diaries-blind-riddle/26732

No one wants to work with Hollywood’s most difficult mother. She now has a reputation among child care agencies for being the most unpopular celebrity nanny employer and many now only send to her the nannies on their staff who specialise in dealing with mega bitch moms.

She is surprisingly less organised than you would think, often requesting services with no lead time and expecting to be offered priority treatment. When the nanny arrives, she often won’t speak to the person directly, communicating via her assistant, and often implying that the person isn’t attractive enough, and because of this, may or may not sell her out. Because only ugly people compromise confidentiality, I guess?

She confiscates cell phones. She also demands to go through the nanny’s private messages. After a dinner party once, when she and her friends were particularly mouthy, backstabbing several prominent actors and actresses, she demanded to search the nanny who had stayed late -- without prior notice -- so as to make sure she wasn’t bugged and threatened legal action for no reason. Speaking of working hours, she has been known to require extra time but isn’t willing to pay for it, rationalising her request by blaming the person for an imaginary offensive -- like missing diapers or a bent branch/stem in the garden. Ie. “I notice that the whatever bush over there looks a little trampled. You weren’t careful enough. You are staying an extra two hours.”

She is known to be verbally abusive and impatient. She once watched a nanny pick up spilled baby food all over the floor while tapping her hand on the counter and criticising the person’s physique and intellect as the reason for why it was taking so long. Many nannies in LA, hearing horror stories from their peers, have turned potential work placements with her because they don’t want to bother with the drama.

Not Jennifer Garner.

May 3, 2013 at 12:24

Update (3/9/15):
Denial: Jennifer Garner

Nanny Diaries

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/22862/Not-a-doting-mother--not-a-kind-employer-blind-riddle

She’s supposed to be the doting mother. Ask the people who help her with her kids. They certainly don’t agree.

First of all she’s never around. And when she’s present she’s distant, not only not involved, but almost irresponsible about it. One of her children may have developmental challenges. As such, diet can exacerbate the issue. Since she can only spend so much time with her children, and often slotted in like appointments in her schedule, she doesn’t bother observing the food requirements that can help with the child’s behaviour. Mom supplies junk food because it’s quick and dirty so that she can get out of there that much faster. When the kid acts out because of the sh-t he’s just consumed, she’s incapable of dealing with it and takes off anyway.

It’s left then to the staff to raise her family. How does she treat them? Nannies’ cell phones are confiscated at 8am and not returned until 10pm. There’s a trusting and kind working environment, non? Totally encourages loyalty.

As you expect, bosses like this always play favourites. Her favourite? Curiously enough, it’s the bodyguard. He’s been seen rubbing her feet. Of course that had nothing to do with the separation ...even though the foot massages have been happening for a while now.

March 2, 2012 at 8:15 AM

Update (9/4/12):
denial 1: Gwyneth Paltrow
clue
reveal 1
reveal 2

 

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer

Wife confronts colleague

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/21653/Wife-confronts-colleague-blind-riddle

A popular married television personality who’s also a chronic cheater had an affair a few years ago with a woman (also married with kids) who’s now become his colleague. The colleague ran into his wife recently. The wife decided they would have a little conversation. There were no pleasantries. The wife pretty much opened with - who did you have to f-ck to get this new position? How many people have you f-cked to get to where you are now? The colleague, obviously mortified, as they’re actually in a place crawling with parents and children, frequented by their own children, tried to be civil, tried to downplay the hostilities. No, the wife wasn’t interested in having a dignified discussion in public. She kept up her line of questioning about the colleague’s career mobility with pointed questions about how much time she’d spent on her back to get to where she is. The badgering continued, the wife was relentless, until the colleague rushed away. The wife is now boasting about the incident to all the ladies in the circle and beyond, convinced that the reason the colleague is getting so much play on the network these days is because she’s willing to give up so much play for the executives, the way she gave it up for her husband.

This isn’t the first time the wife has behaved aggressively. Her husband has pleaded with her to chill out when they’re in public as it could affect his reputation, like his constant dicking isn’t the major contributor to that. Still, her target right now is his colleague and the colleague’s reputation and she seems to be willing, happily willing, to share with anyone who asks how this colleague is earning all her jobs ...though I wonder if all that casting couching is enough since, you know, Julia Roberts didn’t seem to be aware.

October 25, 2011 at 8:53 AM

Update (10/25/11):
clue (regarding the Julia Roberts comment)

Wife confronts colleague

Who would want to work with this?

http://www.laineygossip.com/Who_would_want_to_work_with_this_blind_riddle_14mar11.aspx

She’s long had a reputation for being absolute hell to work with. I mean like straight up crazy. Leaves her sh-t, sometimes literally, everywhere, specifies exact times when people can or cannot talk to her, is foaming at the mouth insane one minute, calm and collected the next. Lately her opportunities have dried up. And this is a good example of why.

Press junket. A handler has to make sure she wakes up in the morning. Because she’s not a proper adult? She finds her completely out of it. Has to put her in the shower and HOLD HER UP. Picture that please. A grown woman having to be physically SUPPORTED in the shower to make sure she can go and do her JOB. She then had to be spoon fed her breakfast. And she had to be dressed. Like, let’s put on your socks! Finally they get her to the point where she can be seen in public. A journalist is soon expected for an interview. Through it all she’s still a f-cking zombie.

Soon as the reporter comes into the room though, a switch goes off. She’s alive. She’s engaging. She can speak in proper sentences. And you can imagine, for the people who’ve experienced this, who’ve had to work with her, who have to manage the unpredictability of this, how scary it must be, how utterly unsettling, even more unsettling than most of her peers. And in her business, that’s a pretty high standard.

Monday, March 14, 2011 at 6:07 AM

Update (2/15/12):

clue?
denial 1 & 2: Maria Bello & Liv Tyler
clue
 

Who would want to work with this?

15 December 2010 Smutty Shout-Out

http://www.laineygossip.com/Smutty_ShoutOuts_15dec10.aspx

there’s an actor, a popular and celebrated one, who has been so universally abusive to handlers lately, from city to city, to those he knows and perfect strangers, that everyone is scrambling for reassignment now that his reputation has travelled with him. Some have even offered to work with lowly C and D listers instead because his cruelty has been horrible, even by Hollywood standards, to the point where there are those who think he’s suffering from mental disease. No, no, let’s not give him an out. He’s a dick. Plain. It’s not Sean Penn.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010 at 6:48 AM

Update (03/15/11):

denial 1: Sean Penn
clue
reveal

15 December 2010 Smutty Shout-Out

Her First Request

http://laineygossip.com/Blind_Riddle_Her_First_Request_05oct10.aspx

Is always cocaine. Whenever she’s booked for something, whenever she’s scheduled to be somewhere, whenever she has to be on, or off, or pretty much standing these days, she needs a bump first, and the lowlies are required to procure her some, which she’ll eventually chase with hard liquor, a habit she’s become quite famous for.

Up until now she’s been able to manage herself quite well. “She’s always been a functioning drug user and drinker, she always gets her sh-t done.” But now that sh-t is turning nasty. It shows up on the side job, ugly, revealing, personal rants that go too long and elicit only embarrassment. Or it shows up as the bitch with her hand between her legs and her tongue stuck in the ear of some leering dickhead whose name she can’t remember the next day.

And her people aren’t doing anything about it. Because, frankly, “this is part of her image, it’s not like (she) ever pretended she never partied. When she talks about partying, everyone gets a cheque”. Enablers notwithstanding, it’s taking those who really care about her longer to notice.

In her case, then, I guess it’s the exact opposite of the child employees: they f-ck up because they’re not allowed to, she f-cks up because she’s encouraged to. Either way it’s becoming a serious problem, exacerbated by the fact that she was recently dumped by a dude who could no longer handle her lifestyle and then immediately moved on to a wholesome new broad 10 years younger.

Tuesday, October 05, 2010 at 6:43 AM

Update (11/03/10):
denial 1: Lindsay Lohan

denial 2: Kate Moss
denial 3, 4 & 5: Susan Sarandon, Tina Fey & Cameron Diaz
denial 6 & 7: Drew Barrymore & Avril Lavigne
denial 8: Helen Mirren
clue
reveal

Her First Request

Hands free

http://www.laineygossip.com/Hands_Free_blind_riddle_12jan10.aspx

A quickie.

Who makes sure that her husband has someone on staff specifically to hold her bag while she watches him at work? This is the employee’s only job responsibility. This person does nothing else but hold the bag. There’s no multitasking here. Because the bag can’t be put away in a room or on a table. It must be held. But not by her. Because she photographs much better when she has her hands free. This is Status. This is Respect. This from a woman who claims she’s down with down home living. Not high maintenance? Please.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010 at 7:18 AM

Update (1/20/10):
denial 1: Nick Cannon
denial 2: Jennifer Garner
guess
reveal
poll results

Hands free

Star Treatment

http://www.laineygossip.com/Star_Treatment.aspx?IsMicro=0

How does he roll?

Private plane on someone else’s dime with specific requests about the type of aircraft…like it’s not enough to bypass commercial flying, you need to fly in a particular model. But that’s just the beginning.

He can only travel in matching (like MATCHING!) SUVs with police escort. Three of them. One left empty. And then a sedan. Why the sedan? Because his lower level staff are not allowed to ride in SUVs. They are beneath SUVs. His staff must also stay in a hotel separate from his.

Then there’s eye contact. No eye contact under any circumstances. If his driver happens to have to idle for more than 15 seconds with him in the car – say they’re packing up gear, or waiting for a delivery – the driver must exit the vehicle until the fleet is ready to move.

Speaking to him of course is out of the question. Speaking in his vicinity is even worse. The only voice he wants to hear is his own. You can talk…but only when he gives you permission. There’s actually a hand signal for that. It comes from his manager.

Hotel staff learn this lesson quickly. Imagine asking someone if he wants fresh towels and have him stare back at you, behind sunglasses, not answering, the silence filling up the room like a flood, how small that person must feel, that person who works and busts her ass for minimum wage, not even to be acknowledged, to feel the message from a millionaire that she is not worth engaging? Not even a nod?

If he walks past you in the hall, you must turn your back. If you don’t turn your back he’ll stop walking. His team will stand in a wall around him for fear that you might breathe on him. Worse still, they will harass you. They will intimidate you. They will treat you like a criminal and report you to make sure you are punished.

All of this and more, communicated without shame, without embarrassment, executed as though it’s the most natural way to behave … these are His Rules.

Thursday, September 18, 2008 at 9:03 AM

Update (11/26/08):
denial 1: Prince
denial 2: Justin Timberlake & Tom Cruise
denial 3: Mike Meyers
denial 4: Snoop Dogg
guess
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3

Star Treatment

Anger Management

http://www.laineygossip.com/Anger_Management_Blind_Item.aspx

It's not just Russell Crowe who has anger issues...only he was stupid enough to beat down a dude who didn't have to survive in the business.

This ferocious lady who in these circles has always been known to be a difficult bitch keeps her attacks, with a few exceptions (like if you make the mistake of not getting out of her way quickly enough at the airport), restricted to those who have to work around her. Like PAs and caterers, makeup artists. Whichever minion catches her in a bad mood and depending on the crime, it could result in an open hand slap to the face, throwing coffee all over someone's pants, and most recently, when craft services wasn't up to her exacting standards, stalking up to an unsuspecting staffer, ripping the phone out of his ear, and screeching to the person on the other line: "you've been talking to a retard who can't do his job."

Apparently her episodes have been getting more and more violent, so much so that the director and producer on her current project have had to call in reinforcements: her husband is now travelling with her to calm her now legendary temper but also to look after the little one, who has been exposed on more than a few occasions to her viotriolic outbursts. So far...it's working. Everyone is relieved but also extra, extra cautious. Calm before the storm.

Thursday, September 04, 2008 at 11:47 AM

Update (10/15/08):
denial 1: Courteney Cox
denial 2: Jessica Alba
denial 3: Kim Basinger
denial 4: Debra Messing
denial 5: Kate Beckinsale
denial 6: Kate Hudson
denial 7: Nicole Ritchie
denial 8: Jennifer Connelly
denial 9: Rachel Weisz
denial 10: Jennifer Garner & Katie Holmes
denial 11: Salma Hayek
denial 12: Catherine Zeta-Jones
denial 13: Diane Lane
denial 14: Brooke Shields

Anger Management

Bad Haired and Bug-Eyed

http://laineygossip.com/Bad_Haired_and_BugEyed_Blind_ItemRiddle.aspx

Which actor has been much too egotistical and much too energetic on press tour recently? Let’s start with the ego first:

He’s not exactly Brad Pitt or the GMD on fame terms and still he travels with a crazy security team and insists on sweeping every location before he will enter. Who the f&ck are you??? Even his own management is snickering at his grossly exaggerated sense of entitlement – hit movies don’t necessarily equate to international superstardom, and while his box office might be lucrative, his celebrity status is decidedly modest.

Still…he insists on super stealth, secret service style maneuvers, and has hilariously mandated that while in public he be referred to by “code name” only. It becomes even funnier when the newly single megalomaniac happens upon an attractive woman. The woman is hustled through stairwells and hallways before their tryst – a procedure so elaborate that last week, his chosen partner for the evening ended up so rattled by the time she arrived at his room, she was no longer in the mood to participate.

And his paranoia is getting worse. It started out as a quirk - several weeks ago he was enthusiastic and perhaps a little particular, but not a paranoid freak. A little blow here and there for extra energy though has become more of a habit and he is getting CRANKED at work. To the point where more than a few journalists have remarked about his over-animated behaviour, as a timid reporter from Asia was frightened and confused during an interview when he became angry at her for refusing to sing karaoke with him. Sorry…I’m a bitch. I had to laugh about that.

Be thankful, dude, for a good publicity team. And for the fact that at the end of the day, it’s really only you.

Thursday, July 24, 2008 at 8:22 AM

Update (8/8/08):
clue 1
clue 2
denial 1: Robert Downey Jr & Jude Law
denial 2: Shia LaBeouf & Joaquin Phoenix
denial 3: Mike Meyers & Jonathan Rhys Meyers
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3

Bad Haired and Bug-Eyed

Keeping it Legal

http://www.laineygossip.com/Keeping_it_Legal.aspx

I love how often the self righteous, artistic ones are always end up being the douchiest and the perviest.

The backstory:

Several years ago, while dating a high profile, fiery actress, he was on location shooting a movie and found himself one night at a local bar. A young hot thing approached, they flirted, they made the call, and pretty soon she was telling her friends she was heading home with the star, protected by both his bodyguards and a personal driver.

So they get back to his place, start making out, she services him with her mouth, and tries to get him to return the favour, at which point he balks and then, no longer blinded by arousal, finally gets around to asking her:

"Are you really 19?"

Well of course she wasn’t 19. She was actually only 16. And when her guilty face confirmed it for him, he quickly called her a cab and sent her home, not offering to pay for her cab. He did however offer to pay for the silence.

His security detail and the chauffeur, all of whom were witnesses to his tryst with the teen, were compensated handsomely for their discretion. They were so trustworthy that he wanted to use their services again when he returned to town for a new project recently. Unfortunately the same team wasn’t entirely intact.

So instead, now single, he went to great lengths to secure a very capable staff to make sure he didn’t find himself in the kind of icky underage situation as last time. Was like having a personal assistant for the express purpose of getting him head and occasionally laid. Only he was strict about wanting it from “real” girls and not from professionals. Every few days or so, his people had to scour the city looking a girl he could spend a short time with. They’d all start off at a group dinner, and by the end of the night, he’d end up sated at place. A few girls were lucky enough for repeats but effort on his part was never forthcoming.

Still… at the very least… he kept it legal.

Thursday, May 01, 2008 at 9:38 AM

Update (9/10/08):
clue
denial 1: Ryan Phillippe
denial 2: Vince Vaughn & Michael Buble
reveal 1
reveal 2

Keeping it Legal

A Bitch to Work For

http://laineygossip.com/A_Bitch_to_Work_For.aspx

Successful multi-hyphenate, super well connected personally and professionally with a reputation for being kind and compassionate and evolved.

Wrong.

Maybe for the media and maybe her fashionable celebrity friends, maybe for investors, maybe for executives, but some of her employees would vehemently disagree.

Turns out she’s a little bit of a Miranda Priestly when she comes in to the office. Starts snapping her fingers right away, never remembers anyone’s name, everyone is treated like a personal assistant, dispatched to do her bidding instead of actually getting down to work, recently held up a creative meeting because she wanted whole milk and not cream with her coffen, then 20 minutes into the meeting, she held it up again when her cell phone rang, proceeded to keep everyone waiting another 15 minutes while she discussed measurements on a dress she was having made, did not apologise when she clicked off the line, and instead embarrassed a staffer who returned to the room after having excused himself to take an urgent phone call when she was taking hers.

But all that is rather pedestrian. There are no shortage of bitches in Hollywood. In the grand scheme of things, all that is pretty harmless.

Until you get into job security.

A pregnant member of her staff was scheduled to give birth around crunch time. Her boss’s convenient remedy for the situation was to not hire her back when everyone else returned to work. At the very least she was honest. She told her straight up – your due date doesn’t work for me. I don’t think you’ll be able to contribute in the same way you did before.

So the employee hired a lawyer, a lawsuit loomed, and the boss bitch had to backpedal to the tune of a handsome pay-off (confidential, of course) and several seminars on employee rights although it apparently hasn’t helped.

She’s still super stingy, to the point where she complains about the quality of craft services (it’s too good) and even supplies, haggles over offering vacation pay, and will not foot the bill for staff celebrations and events, even though she regularly hosts lavish affairs at her own mansion for those privileged enough to be invited.

Crazier still, she seems to be clueless when it comes to tact. The other day she said to one of her producers – if you need something to do this weekend, my assistant could use some help planning our reception. You could stay for dinner if you want.

When he declined, she looked at him like he was closing the door to the opportunity of a lifetime.

Before you ask, it’s not the Mighty Opes.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008 at 7:30 AM

Update (10/15/08):
poll
clue 1
clue 2
clue 3
denial 1: Oprah
denial 2: Tyra Banks, Martha Stewart, Vera Wang & Sarah Jessica Parker
denial 3: Victoria Beckham, Kimora Lee Simmons, Rachel Ray & Courteney Cox
denial 4: Catherine Zeta-Jones & Beyonce
denial 5: Kelly Ripa & Victoria Beckham
denial 6: Heidi Klum & Gwen Stefani
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4

A Bitch to Work For

The Wrong Colour, the Wrong Number

http://laineygossip.com/The_Wrong_Colour_the_Wrong_Number.aspx

It’s officially an epidemic – celebrities walking around intoxicated by their own ridiculous sense of entitlement, unleashing a steady stream of bad behaviour for which my Chinese squawking chicken mother would have me flogged if I ever dared to emulate.

For some people however fame excuses the need for good manners. For this girl who is NOT the “no looking” one from last week, fame excuses the need to be appreciative and grateful and shameful.

So she’s promoting a new project, is making the rounds. Gets picked up in a very very high end luxury car. Like super luxury. It pulls up to pick her up and she refuses to get in because “she doesn’t like the colour”. It’s too bright. She doesn’t “do that colour”.

After half an hour she’s finally coaxed inside. Then she throws another fit because there are 5 water bottles inside the car. Odd numbers. She doesn’t like odd numbers. She specifically requested even numbers. Near meltdown ensues.

Next stop – her dressing room on a show where she’s scheduled to perform. Her people apparently requested “skinny mirrors’. Skinny mirrors were not ordered. Regular mirrors were ordered. She takes one look at herself and threatens to walk. She is placated by the promise of a one week resort stay in the Caribbean. And I haven’t even bothered to share the details of her catering complaints: not enough sashimi, not enough champagne, sandwiches were too soggy, and on and on and on.

Someone needs to invent The Slapper. The Slapper needs to slap this bitch hard.

Let me save you some work: not Mimi, Whitney, Janet, Madonna, or Lopez

Monday, March 03, 2008 at 11:14 AM

Update (7/21/08):
denial 1: Mariah Carey, Janet Jackson, Madonna & Jennifer Lopez
denial 2: Beyonce & Rihanna
denial 3: Mary J Blige & Bette Midler
denial 4: Paula Abdul & Toni Braxton
denial 5: Cher, Kelly Clarkson & Jennifer Hudson
denial 6: Carrie Underwood
denial 7: Avril Lavigne
denial 8: Scarlett Johansson
denial 9: Celine Dion
denial 10: Jordin Sparks

The Wrong Colour, the Wrong Number

No Looking, No Talking, No Breathing

http://laineygossip.com/No_Looking_No_Talking_No_Breathing.aspx

Diva antics are rather pedestrian these days so it takes a super bitch and her ass attitude to really push the envelope.

A photo shoot with a major artist. Much is riding on her new project. Everyone is busting their balls to make her look good. But it’s hard with these instructions:

Don’t talk to her, don’t look at her, and … don’t even breathe in her direction.

Don’t breathe in her direction!

Worse still – not sure if you know what it’s like at a photo shoot but the lighting, the set, the hair, the makeup, the equipment, it can all get pretty technical, especially for someone this important. Unfortunately, she couldn’t pose with people standing around. Girl has filled stadiums and she can’t have her photo taken with a room full of staff? Please.

So after lining up every shot, everyone but the photographer had to leave the room. Needless to say, things need tweaking from minute to minute. Literally, he would take one frame and have to call out to bring someone back in for an adjustment before moving on. Imagine – every move required another callback to have someone else run in to make a quick fix only to dash back out.

Needless to say, this extended the shoot time exponentially. And under those conditions, people are not going to be inspired to put out their best work.

Why is this such a mystery anyway? The nicer you are, the nicer you get back! Is it so hard? Is is physically difficult to be nice?

And seriously…who is she anymore anyway? She needs it more than they do. The way she’s acting though, she’ll be staring another failure straight in the face.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 9:33:36 AM

Update (10/15/08):
denial 1: Katherine Heigl, Jennifer Lopez & Madonna
denial 2: Whitney Houston, Erykah Badu & Jessica Simpson
denial 3: Paula Abdul & Alicia Keys
denial 4: Carrie Underwood
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3

No Looking, No Talking, No Breathing

Good Help is Hard to Find

http://laineygossip.com/Good_Help_is_Hard_to_Find.aspx

Celebrities don’t always have it easy, you know. As is the case with Britney Spears, a competent assistant is a valuable commodity, especially one who won’t sell you out and will still pick up your dirty undies.

But picking up panties is one thing… picking up your drugs is another matter entirely. What’s a highly regarded actor to do when he can’t pay someone to pick up his drugs??? Especially when he has such a voracious appetite?

Given recent events, you’d think he’d know better… and while I can certainly sympathise with a serious addict, how can you sympathise with someone who would rather compromise an employee than risk getting caught?

At least own your own sh*t, you know?

But it’s all about the image isn’t it? He is an acclaimed artist, who is involved and informed and aware, idolised by some for his impish good looks – a selfish junkie isn’t usually what comes to mind. Those in the industry however have surely seen him openly spread his blow all over the dinner table, at any given party, and put half of it into his brain. So brazen is he that he used to carry his stash on his body while travelling, tucked into a coat pocket, cavalierly going through security.

Over the last three months or so however he’s suddenly become a lot more paranoid. And so the task of transporting his happy across borders has rested on his personal assistants. It took her three carries before she finally put her foot down and refused. And got fired for it. The girl who took her place made it only once before quitting herself.

He’s still looking for a replacement.

Substance abuse is one thing. Allowing someone else to take the fall for your addiction is another. Selfish prick.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008 at 8:04:01 AM

Update (9/2/08):
denial 1: Ryan Gosling, Leonardo DiCaprio, Orlando Bloom, George Clooney & Elijah Wood
denial 2: Sean Penn, Colin Farrell & Sean Combs (P Diddy)
denial 3: Jack Nicholson, Toby Maguire, Sean Penn & Jake Gyllenhaal
denial 4: Christian Bale & Jude Law
denial 5: James Franco
clue
denial 6: John Cusack
denial 7: Justin Timberlake
denial 8: Josh Hartnett & Sting
denial 9: Jonathan Rhys Myers
denial 10: Jamie Foxx
reveal

Good Help is Hard to Find

Her hiring frenzy

http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=3336
No one has everything. Even when they seem like they do, there's always something missing. And she's no exception. While her relationship might be mismatched, to say the least, their love appears to be real. Professional success, family support, careers that cross… these two have managed to pull it together and they couldn’t be happier. Except that the thing they want the most has eluded them. The longer it takes, the more she fears that the very personal and very controversial decisions and the discards and the rejections she made while young and ambitious are coming back to haunt her. The problem is - he doesn't know. And since the people who DO know from back in the day are whispering so loudly of late, she's desperate to buy their silence. She's offering money and she's offering jobs. She's calling in favours, she's pulling strings, and she's raising eyebrows. All of a sudden, her projects are completely staffed by those who need to keep her confidence. Which means she's having to answer his questions on that front as well. Poor thing is apparently so stressed out about having to keep all these secrets that she isn't getting much sleep, made worse by the fact that she has to play happy and content all day long. With any luck though, all this will change soon. After all, it's not like they haven't been trying.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Update (7/18/08):
Denial 1: Catherine Zeta-Jones & Michael Douglas
Denial 2: Calista Flockhart & Harrison Ford
reveal

Her hiring frenzy

Cheap & Crafty

http://www.laineygossip.com/Cheap_and_Crafty.aspx

No shortage of classless behaviour in Hollywood and above the maybe gaybe speculation and the drug drama, it’s these stories that are the most shocking:

How can the privileged behave so poorly?

Especially someone who sounds so elegant? Whose record has been spotless and golden?

Then again, it’s always the ones you least expect.

In her case however it’s become an M.O., a trail of cheapness wherever she goes.

So you know when you stay at a hotel, if the soap and bath products happen to be on the higher end, it’s customary to ask for a few refills and take some home? This of course is standard behaviour for US…because we’re broke!

But how about a busy, working actress, married to a busy working man, both with several projects on the go – does it then become less acceptable? Almost shameful? I think so yes.

And still she does it wherever she goes – on junkets, on promotional tours, whenever she’s at a hotel, she orders up extras: extra shampoo, extra lotion, even extra bathrobes, taking EVERYTHING home… yes, even the bathrobes. The bathrobes that are washed then used again by every guest staying in that suite, she insists on bringing it all with her. Including the gifts too.

She is also not shy with special requests. Lighting fixtures, humidifiers, strollers – kinda major items you’d think would be on loan, right?

Wrong.

She packs those up with her too. The woman leaves NOTHING behind.

The question is: what does she do with it all?

Would you believe she gives it to her staff? She saves the little soaps and gels and crafts them into small baskets and presents them to the nannies and the housekeepers as bonuses!

Can you imagine? Can you imagine a Christmas gift basket full of hotel shampoos and conditioners?

I mean How.F&cking.Tacky.

Monday, November 19, 2007 at 9:05:53 AM

Update (10/28/08):
guess 1: Kate Beckinsale
denial 1: Cate Blanchett & Kate Winslet
denial 2: Salma Hayek & Sarah Jessica Parker
denial 3: Gwyneth Paltrow & Hilary Swank
denial 4: Jennifer Garner
denial 5: Angelina Jolie
denial 6: Katie Holmes
denial 7: Catherine Zeta-Jones
denial 8: Brooke Shields
guess 2: Jennifer Connolly
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4

Cheap & Crafty

Secrets from the BFF

http://www.laineygossip.com/Secrets_from_the_BFF.aspx

Old gossip now leaking, courtesy of her BFF – in whose chair she sat after her split, receiving therapy and getting pretty at the same time. That’s what friends are for.

Only lately her BFF is getting tired of her attitude problem – friendship is apparently on her terms and the BFF is treated alternately as servant and confidante. So since the BFF can be as catty as they come, secrets are starting seep, shedding light on several mysteries, including weight, children, and heartbreak, all pointing to one cause.

Male hormones???

According to the BFF, she took male hormones as a way to stay thin. As a result, she miscarried at least once, which is what resulted in the big break – she lost love because she was obsessed with being skinny…so says the BFF. The BFF also confirms that she has since stopped, which is why her body is back to lovely.

Still…her reputation, or her looks for that matter, won’t be lovely for long if BFF keeps yapping. In many ways, in one very critical way, she needs her buddy more than her buddy needs her.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007 at 2:07:26 PM

Update (09/28/10):
denial 1 & 2: Ken Paves & Jennifer Lopez
denial 3 (Courteney Cox)/reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3

Secrets from the BFF