24 April 2015 Smutty Shout-Outs

http://www.laineygossip.com/April-24--2015-Smutty-Shout-Outs/38311

Here’s a fun one that hits a lot of gossip spots.

She has a new assistant who works hard, who’s very capable, who is also very attractive. After an event recently, the celebrity left with a gift bag. Inside the bag was a new fragrance. She gave the fragrance to her assistant. The assistant started wearing it as her signature scent. Over the next few days, everyone started commenting on how good she smelled. A couple weeks later, the celebrity asks her assistant to GIVE BACK the cologne. And she starts wearing it instead.

April 24, 2015 at 7:07 AM

24 April 2015 Smutty Shout-Outs

Nanny Diaries

http://www.laineygossip.com/Nanny-Diaries-blind-riddle/26732

No one wants to work with Hollywood’s most difficult mother. She now has a reputation among child care agencies for being the most unpopular celebrity nanny employer and many now only send to her the nannies on their staff who specialise in dealing with mega bitch moms.

She is surprisingly less organised than you would think, often requesting services with no lead time and expecting to be offered priority treatment. When the nanny arrives, she often won’t speak to the person directly, communicating via her assistant, and often implying that the person isn’t attractive enough, and because of this, may or may not sell her out. Because only ugly people compromise confidentiality, I guess?

She confiscates cell phones. She also demands to go through the nanny’s private messages. After a dinner party once, when she and her friends were particularly mouthy, backstabbing several prominent actors and actresses, she demanded to search the nanny who had stayed late -- without prior notice -- so as to make sure she wasn’t bugged and threatened legal action for no reason. Speaking of working hours, she has been known to require extra time but isn’t willing to pay for it, rationalising her request by blaming the person for an imaginary offensive -- like missing diapers or a bent branch/stem in the garden. Ie. “I notice that the whatever bush over there looks a little trampled. You weren’t careful enough. You are staying an extra two hours.”

She is known to be verbally abusive and impatient. She once watched a nanny pick up spilled baby food all over the floor while tapping her hand on the counter and criticising the person’s physique and intellect as the reason for why it was taking so long. Many nannies in LA, hearing horror stories from their peers, have turned potential work placements with her because they don’t want to bother with the drama.

Not Jennifer Garner.

May 3, 2013 at 12:24

Update (3/9/15):
Denial: Jennifer Garner

Nanny Diaries

Even B List needs a beard

http://www.laineygossip.com/Even_B_List_needs_a_beard_blind_riddle_29mar11.aspx

It’s not just the super elite actors, the film stars, who need to beard and pretend. Even the lower ranking ones do too. Calling him B List might be a little generous, but he has had his share of magazine covers, is the face of a few shows, and is surprisingly entrepreneurial, with successful projects across several other platforms, all banking on looks and virility. While I can’t personally see it, his appeal is strong enough that it has overcome his reputation as a chronic philanderer whose wife left him because he couldn’t stay faithful. It was always assumed that he was cheating with women. And in a way, given his errrm sex symbol image, that may have worked for him.

But what if the cheating was with men? One night in New York, he was on the receiving end of a very enthusiastic blow job from a very enthusiastic young giver who was clearly not his baby mother because his baby mother is, obviously, not a boy. The baby mother very likely knows though. After all, it wouldn’t be an arrangement that she’d be unfamiliar with, given where they met. Still, dude, if you’re keeping that kind of secret, and you hit up a bar to get blown, you may want to tip the staff a little better than you do. Because they are talking. And it’s not like people haven’t been wondering this about you for a long, long time anyway.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011 at 7:32 AM

Update (3/29/11):

denial 1: Rob Lowe

denial 2: Mark Wahlberg

clue

denial 3: John Stamos

Even B List needs a beard

CheapAssNess

http://www.laineygossip.com/CheapAssNess_Blind_Riddle_22june10.aspx

Tori Spelling says that everybody hates her from 90210. No doubt. But more people probably hate this other bitch who has virtually alienated all of her former costars and is widely known to be a pain in the ass but for some reason enjoys a popularity and a paycheque usually reserved for much more accomplished actors.

So she’s rich now, yes, but that doesn’t mean she’s generous. And she’ll gouge you while she can, so aggressively that she was reprimanded by executives recently for trying to wrangle cash money out of the budget to pay for her hotel suites. Not an expense account, but straight up CASH. Apparently she was so belligerent about getting a free ride, and using her free ride cash money in other shady ways, so relentless with the demands, the people on the receiving end were emotional wrecks by the end of her tantrum. This was abuse.

But there’s a history here: she’s already been rejected by her former bosses for insisting that they contribute to the furnishing of her personal residence and for inexplicably requesting that they cover the cost of her mother’s car. Every time they said no, she would call it an injustice, adding to a long list of perceived injustices that she claims affected her performance.

People have been trying and trying to excuse her f-ckery. There is no excuse. She is not kind, she is not gracious, and she is cheap as sh-t.

We can talk about this at S.M.U.T. Tickets are going fast. Click here before it’s too late.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010 at 11:34 AM

Update (6/22/10):

clue 1

clue 2

CheapAssNess

Being cheap is unforgiveable

http://www.laineygossip.com/Being_cheap_is_unforgiveable.aspx

He’s super hot. He’s moderately successful. He’s probably not gay – although one can never be sure in Hollywood. He’s also always working. So why is it that he can’t find a woman? Maybe it’s because his mediocre skills in the boudoir are complemented by some tightwad tendencies that his good looks simply can’t make up for.

On the first few dates, everything is fine. But then he begins to squirm if the unlucky lady orders something a little too extravagant on the menu. An expensive bottle of wine on birthdays is out of the question and don’t even bother calling him on his cell before the free minutes kick in. Totally understandable behaviour for a starving actor but definitely NOT acceptable for a dude who is a definite headliner, even if his movies do suck sh*t.

So a few weeks ago, he takes out a new girl. They have a good time, they go out again, she’s really charmed, she sleeps with him, and she stays overnight. Next morning – they oversleep, he has a meeting and can’t drive her home. So she calls a cab but she has no cash. He spots her $100, they say goodbye, and agree to see each other later. When they hook up next time, he actually asks her TO PAY HIM BACK!
AND – to top it all off – his feet smell!!!

Okay gossips, take it easy before you email me. I’m under strict orders for no additional clues on this one. Which means I can only say yes or no. One guess. Good luck.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Being cheap is STILL unforgiveable

http://www.laineygossip.com/Being_cheap_is_STILL_unforgiveable.aspx

So he won’t splurge on dinner, he’s tight with cabfare, and his feet smell. Think it can’t get any worse? Apparently my man also has the maturity of a 10 year old. And so do all his friends. His last relationship with potential ended because of one too many days like this:

She’s been out of town for a couple of weeks. He’s been hanging with the boys the whole time. She gets home, they make plans to stay in for a quiet dinner, catch up, make some love. All good things, right? Two hours later, the night is half over and she’s still waiting. Turns out he’s been playing video games and lost track of time. So she calls, he answers, apologies sincerely and promises to be over right away. Only as soon as the words out of his mouth, she can hear his buddies jeer and complain and taunt. Very high school, I know. The only problem is – he’s like a decade and a half outta his senior year and he still changed his mind right away. “Sorry, I can’t leave the guys babe. We’ll do it tomorrow night.” Needless to say, you know how it ended.

In a town like Hollywood, where every 2 bit skank is jonesin’ to hook up with a screen idol, this guy is still single. So can you imagine what a feeble little f&ck he really must be???

One more chance to guess. Good luck.

Friday, October 07, 2005

Update (2/6/10):
reveal 1

reveal 2

Being cheap is unforgiveable

Cheap & Crafty

http://www.laineygossip.com/Cheap_and_Crafty.aspx

No shortage of classless behaviour in Hollywood and above the maybe gaybe speculation and the drug drama, it’s these stories that are the most shocking:

How can the privileged behave so poorly?

Especially someone who sounds so elegant? Whose record has been spotless and golden?

Then again, it’s always the ones you least expect.

In her case however it’s become an M.O., a trail of cheapness wherever she goes.

So you know when you stay at a hotel, if the soap and bath products happen to be on the higher end, it’s customary to ask for a few refills and take some home? This of course is standard behaviour for US…because we’re broke!

But how about a busy, working actress, married to a busy working man, both with several projects on the go – does it then become less acceptable? Almost shameful? I think so yes.

And still she does it wherever she goes – on junkets, on promotional tours, whenever she’s at a hotel, she orders up extras: extra shampoo, extra lotion, even extra bathrobes, taking EVERYTHING home… yes, even the bathrobes. The bathrobes that are washed then used again by every guest staying in that suite, she insists on bringing it all with her. Including the gifts too.

She is also not shy with special requests. Lighting fixtures, humidifiers, strollers – kinda major items you’d think would be on loan, right?

Wrong.

She packs those up with her too. The woman leaves NOTHING behind.

The question is: what does she do with it all?

Would you believe she gives it to her staff? She saves the little soaps and gels and crafts them into small baskets and presents them to the nannies and the housekeepers as bonuses!

Can you imagine? Can you imagine a Christmas gift basket full of hotel shampoos and conditioners?

I mean How.F&cking.Tacky.

Monday, November 19, 2007 at 9:05:53 AM

Update (10/28/08):
guess 1: Kate Beckinsale
denial 1: Cate Blanchett & Kate Winslet
denial 2: Salma Hayek & Sarah Jessica Parker
denial 3: Gwyneth Paltrow & Hilary Swank
denial 4: Jennifer Garner
denial 5: Angelina Jolie
denial 6: Katie Holmes
denial 7: Catherine Zeta-Jones
denial 8: Brooke Shields
guess 2: Jennifer Connolly
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4

Cheap & Crafty

Punk Ass Cheap

http://www.laineygossip.com/Justin_Timberlake_Jessica_Biel_Contrition_PDA.aspx

What’s worse than Rossum? What’s worse than Rossum is a CHEAP celebrity. What’s worse than a CHEAP celebrity are two CHEAP celebrities.

Both successful, both earning millions, both with new projects on the go…both in Toronto last weekend treated to a complimentary dinner at a posh supper club. And leaving only a six dollar tip.

SIX DOLLARS.

Of course the teenage fan defence will be that stars don’t carry cash. Fair enough. But if you don’t have cash, do whatever it takes – call your farking manager, call your assistant, call your band if you have to, get a few bills and tip the hard working server who has to make your punk asses happy for 2 hours, would you?

As of Thursday, no follow up visit has been made for more generous gratuity.

Un. Forgivable.

But then again, not that surprising. She’s always been a twat anyway. And he’s a twat for loving her.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Update (7/15/08):
clue

Other Punk Ass incidents
Which little Punk Ass...

Punk Ass Cheap

Abusing the help

http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=2630

Her husband would be shocked to learn how she behaves when he’s not home. Because on the outside, she is “supposedly” erudite, and classy, and goes on about being well mannered and respectful, but when she’s alone, without the eyes and ears of an audience, in the presence of only her household employees, this not so ladylike lady is a slob of the worst kind. But even more than this – she is mean, she is rude, and she treats people badly.

If the staff is making too much noise cleaning and dusting or simply cooking for her highness – she thunders down the stairs and puts her finger between the eyes of the offender, threatening termination of employment and a horrible referral. When she’s going through a “fat” day, it is pure mayhem. The breakfast tray that’s delivered to her in the morning gets smashed to the ground and if there are resulting stains from her tantrum, the blame falls on the help.

As awful as this sounds, it’s actually rather pedestrian when you consider what it’s like to work for the rich and the famous. Up to now, it’s been bearable. And then she crossed the line. She likes to smoke, you see. Especially when she’s on the phone. But she hates smoking outside. And she also can’t stay still. So she came up with the following brilliant request: every time she lit up, a staff person was required to follow her around, catching the ashes as she randomly flicked them about the house. Given that this happens several times a day, the other work was getting neglected. And the poor employee was forced to stay late. With no extra pay. I’m sure it wouldn’t surprise you to learn that the staffer quit after a couple of weeks of this kind of abuse. And rightly so. Why does being cheap and badly behaved always go hand in hand???

Again…one guess. Good luck. And it’s not Victoria Beckham.

Sunday, October 30, 2005

More amusing and abusing
http://www.laineygossip.com/More_amusing_and_abusing.aspx

So you already know that she's a legendary slob. And you know about her outrageous housekeeping demands. But it seems our sadistic mistress also has some self image issues. What's new, right? The only problem is, sometimes she can't wait to get to the bathroom before purging her binge. When it's one of those days, the poor staffers can do nothing else but clean up a messy trail all around the house. And dealing with her hysterics doesn't help either. But then again, it is certainly a sight to behold when she pulls it all together in time for the arrival of her husband. Oh, if he only knew…
Good luck. One more guess. Use it wisely.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

 

Update (7/15/08):
denial: Victoria Beckham
reveal

 

 

 

The Assy-ness of Ashley
Mute Stones & Nude Windows

Abusing the help