PS. These Rules don’t belong to Mike Myers, not that he doesn’t have his very own douchey requirements.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Showing posts with label Mike Meyers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mike Meyers. Show all posts
http://www.laineygossip.com/Intro_23sep08.aspx
PS. These Rules don’t belong to Mike Myers, not that he doesn’t have his very own douchey requirements.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
PS. These Rules don’t belong to Mike Myers, not that he doesn’t have his very own douchey requirements.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
PPS. Mike Myers is not bad haired and bug-eyed. Also not Jonathan Rhys Meyers.
PPS. Mike Myers is not bad haired and bug-eyed. Also not Jonathan Rhys Meyers.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
PPS. Jude Law is not one of the boys. Neither is Three Whiskies Orlando Bloom. Or Mike Myers.
PPS. Jude Law is not one of the boys. Neither is Three Whiskies Orlando Bloom. Or Mike Myers.
http://www.laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_is_a_douchebag_.aspx
If you’ve been visiting this site for a while and familiar with the riddles, this portrait of Mike Myers from Entertainment Weekly shouldn’t surprise you. Perfectionist? Or a pain in the f&cking ass? According to his supporters, his “comic genius” allows him licence to act a douchebag and treat people like sh*t. Problem is, he’s pissed off so many they’re actually pulling for him NOT to succeed.
The Love Guru takes on Get Smart this weekend. It was an unusual move by both studios – rare that two big budget pictures are going head to head on the same weekend. The common practice in recent years has been to move things around to avoid direct confrontation. But neither blinked. Rumour has it that, for Mike at least, it’s become a bit of an ego trip. He wants to take Steve down…
Will Get Smart flop?
Hopefully not.
Here’s Steve with his wife last night at the premiere in LA and please go see Get Smart. Think of it this way – if The Love Guru is a huge hit, we’ll never hear the end of it from Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake who’ll probably start taking credit for saving the film. Not unlike the way he took credit for saving the Grammys.
Tuesday – am online all day. Remember to refresh. NKOTB article is coming… it’s a long one and was distracted yesterday by the US Open. Miss golf. Hate Mischa Barton!
Yours in gossip,
Lainey
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Dear Gossips,If you’ve been visiting this site for a while and familiar with the riddles, this portrait of Mike Myers from Entertainment Weekly shouldn’t surprise you. Perfectionist? Or a pain in the f&cking ass? According to his supporters, his “comic genius” allows him licence to act a douchebag and treat people like sh*t. Problem is, he’s pissed off so many they’re actually pulling for him NOT to succeed.
The Love Guru takes on Get Smart this weekend. It was an unusual move by both studios – rare that two big budget pictures are going head to head on the same weekend. The common practice in recent years has been to move things around to avoid direct confrontation. But neither blinked. Rumour has it that, for Mike at least, it’s become a bit of an ego trip. He wants to take Steve down…
Will Get Smart flop?
Hopefully not.
Here’s Steve with his wife last night at the premiere in LA and please go see Get Smart. Think of it this way – if The Love Guru is a huge hit, we’ll never hear the end of it from Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake who’ll probably start taking credit for saving the film. Not unlike the way he took credit for saving the Grammys.
Tuesday – am online all day. Remember to refresh. NKOTB article is coming… it’s a long one and was distracted yesterday by the US Open. Miss golf. Hate Mischa Barton!
Yours in gossip,
Lainey
http://laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_to_host_MTV_Movie_Awards.aspx
The Unfunny Host
Mike Myers will host the MTV Movie Awards as part of the promotional lead-up to the release of The Love Guru. No doubt, his spoof clips will be hilarious. For the viewer that is. The real question though – will they be hilarious for the people working on them? Or will they have to overcome the monumental difficulty of producing the features without actually looking at or talking to their star?
What???
But Mike is Canadian! Canadians are NEVER douchebags… right? Please. Ask anyone who worked with Avril Lavigne at the Junos this weekend and you’ll know that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Still… on the outside, Mike is as charming as they come:
"Hosting the MTV Movie Awards is like a party, but without having to do beer runs in your mom's mini van. We do beer runs in Will Smith's four-story motor home."
Interesting he chose Will Smith to write a joke about. In a motor home. Just sayin’…
Wednesday, April 09, 2008 at 8:58 AM
The gaydar A-lister must be Arnold Shwarzenegger. But I'm at a loss for the B-lister. I want to say Mike Meyers or Eddie Murphy, but they're not exactly what I'd call 'thespians'. John Lithgow is too old. Antonio Banderas? Please, do tell.
Dear Sharon:
Definitely NOT Arnold. But probably more politically astute. As for the B-lister... none of the above. Everyone you listed is head and shoulders in rank above this greasy beefcake, although Antonio might be your closest guess, geographically speaking.
Sunday, January 15, 2006
http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=3804
Marriage doesn't necesssarily negate the gay. Not that that's news to you, right? But what happens when you can no longer rely on it to cover the glitter? Well in his case, the best move is to make sure everyone *thinks* you're out for tail. Female tail. A bevy of friends' friends, assistants, orchestrated dinners or outings just to be seen, and subsequent stories that show up here and there, just to keep up the illusion.
But behind closed doors, it's men men men all the time. And there's nothing wrong with it. Nothing at all. But I hear he recently veered dangerously on the young side - not knowing, of course. Although it ended up being legal - age wise - the encounter was costly and his management is now trying to keep his sexual exploits to a safe minimum. Right now, it looks like he's behaving himself. Wonder how long that will last…
And it's NOT Eddie Murphy.
Needing Supervision... and a Beard
http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=3924
Remember him? From a riddle I posted on May 1st? About a closeted star getting a little too bold about his boyfriends, long before so many other blind items from other gossip outlets?
Well it appears the gay is out of the bag. And it only took this long because for many, many years he kept his true homo hidden and disguised under marriage from a now deceased relative who would not have accepted it. Now that the loved one is no longer with us, he's free to be single and on the prowl. The problem is his management doesn't want him prowling publicly. They were already alarmed before and now that so many columns have been alluding to his sequins and feathers, they are desperate to find him his very own Katie, an engineered romance to take the heat off the gay talk.
But - shocker of shockers! - he is actually thinking about living in the light, much to the consternation of his handlers who predict a huge drop in earning potential should he expose his hidden sequins. And that's the part that I find absurd. Because trust me, he's hardly a heartthrob. In fact, past roles would indicate quite the opposite.
Still… the agents are the experts and for some reason, they think he'd do better as a Straight. Which explains the backstage battle. And the best part is - we get to find out who wins soon enough. Because I hear he'll either come out flaming by the end of the year or have a high profile non-gay romance just in time to begin marketing for his next major release - a family (read conservative) comedy that is expected to make a killing at the box office.
And can I just mention - once again - that I had this on May 1st??? Sorry…just wanted to drive the point home for the benefit of the disbelievers out there. It's a called a date stamp, y'all. And it's not Hugh Jackman. Or John Travolta.
Update (7/18/08):
Denial 1: Eddie Murphy
Denial 2: John Travolta & Nick Lachey
Denial 3: Hugh Jackman & John Travolta
Denial 4: Matthew McConaughey & Matthew Broderick
More about Mike Meyers
The Unfunny Douche
Marriage doesn't necesssarily negate the gay. Not that that's news to you, right? But what happens when you can no longer rely on it to cover the glitter? Well in his case, the best move is to make sure everyone *thinks* you're out for tail. Female tail. A bevy of friends' friends, assistants, orchestrated dinners or outings just to be seen, and subsequent stories that show up here and there, just to keep up the illusion.
But behind closed doors, it's men men men all the time. And there's nothing wrong with it. Nothing at all. But I hear he recently veered dangerously on the young side - not knowing, of course. Although it ended up being legal - age wise - the encounter was costly and his management is now trying to keep his sexual exploits to a safe minimum. Right now, it looks like he's behaving himself. Wonder how long that will last…
And it's NOT Eddie Murphy.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Needing Supervision... and a Beard
http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=3924
Remember him? From a riddle I posted on May 1st? About a closeted star getting a little too bold about his boyfriends, long before so many other blind items from other gossip outlets?
Well it appears the gay is out of the bag. And it only took this long because for many, many years he kept his true homo hidden and disguised under marriage from a now deceased relative who would not have accepted it. Now that the loved one is no longer with us, he's free to be single and on the prowl. The problem is his management doesn't want him prowling publicly. They were already alarmed before and now that so many columns have been alluding to his sequins and feathers, they are desperate to find him his very own Katie, an engineered romance to take the heat off the gay talk.
But - shocker of shockers! - he is actually thinking about living in the light, much to the consternation of his handlers who predict a huge drop in earning potential should he expose his hidden sequins. And that's the part that I find absurd. Because trust me, he's hardly a heartthrob. In fact, past roles would indicate quite the opposite.
Still… the agents are the experts and for some reason, they think he'd do better as a Straight. Which explains the backstage battle. And the best part is - we get to find out who wins soon enough. Because I hear he'll either come out flaming by the end of the year or have a high profile non-gay romance just in time to begin marketing for his next major release - a family (read conservative) comedy that is expected to make a killing at the box office.
And can I just mention - once again - that I had this on May 1st??? Sorry…just wanted to drive the point home for the benefit of the disbelievers out there. It's a called a date stamp, y'all. And it's not Hugh Jackman. Or John Travolta.
Monday, May 29, 2006
Update (7/18/08):
Denial 1: Eddie Murphy
Denial 2: John Travolta & Nick Lachey
Denial 3: Hugh Jackman & John Travolta
Denial 4: Matthew McConaughey & Matthew Broderick
More about Mike Meyers
The Unfunny Douche
http://www.laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_acts_like_a_diva_on_the_set_of_The_Love_Guru.aspx
No seriously…
Mike Myers. Like…do you care? Do you really?
So he’s made a few funny movies but is Mike Myers, on the Hollywood fame scale, is he really a two assistant, can’t hold his own water bottle kind of guy??? Is he really?
Because apparently HE thinks he is. The NY Daily News is reporting that Mike walks around like a king on the set of The Love Guru flanked always by two male assistants (you don’t say???). One minion holds an umbrella and the other is armed at the ready with a water bottle and a straw to be pointed at the direction of Mike’s mouth so he can sip whenever he needs.
Mike is also supposedly not able to focus with the glare coming off of reflective surfaces – is he a f&cking professional actor or what??? – and so crew members are constantly running around the set with black tape making sure nothing is getting into Mr Myers’s eye. Rather douchey, non? And not very funny either.
But then again…are you surprised? You shouldn’t be.
Monday, October 22, 2007
No seriously…
Mike Myers. Like…do you care? Do you really?
So he’s made a few funny movies but is Mike Myers, on the Hollywood fame scale, is he really a two assistant, can’t hold his own water bottle kind of guy??? Is he really?
Because apparently HE thinks he is. The NY Daily News is reporting that Mike walks around like a king on the set of The Love Guru flanked always by two male assistants (you don’t say???). One minion holds an umbrella and the other is armed at the ready with a water bottle and a straw to be pointed at the direction of Mike’s mouth so he can sip whenever he needs.
Mike is also supposedly not able to focus with the glare coming off of reflective surfaces – is he a f&cking professional actor or what??? – and so crew members are constantly running around the set with black tape making sure nothing is getting into Mr Myers’s eye. Rather douchey, non? And not very funny either.
But then again…are you surprised? You shouldn’t be.
Monday, October 22, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Joshua_Jackson_low_key_shooting_movie_in_Toronto.aspx
Right now – late afternoon in Toronto – Joshua Jackson is shooting his new movie in East Toronto. Super low key. There’s a craft services table, no trailer, no super star amenities, and between filming a scene where he’s riding an old little bike around, he’s been spotting just hanging out with the crew. Actually talking to them. Befriending them. Not ordering them around. Not barking for grilled cheese sandwiches cut specifically into four pieces lest he storm off in a huff and refuse to work the entire day.
Yes. That is the Unfunny Douche who, like Joshua, is also Canadian but seems to have lost his Canadian humility a long, long time ago.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Right now – late afternoon in Toronto – Joshua Jackson is shooting his new movie in East Toronto. Super low key. There’s a craft services table, no trailer, no super star amenities, and between filming a scene where he’s riding an old little bike around, he’s been spotting just hanging out with the crew. Actually talking to them. Befriending them. Not ordering them around. Not barking for grilled cheese sandwiches cut specifically into four pieces lest he storm off in a huff and refuse to work the entire day.
Yes. That is the Unfunny Douche who, like Joshua, is also Canadian but seems to have lost his Canadian humility a long, long time ago.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Unfunny_Douche.aspx
Primadonna bitch is shooting a movie in Toronto and amazing people with his demands. First he refused to be driven in a limo to the set an hour away and demanded to be helicoptered there instead by his production company. Then his coffee wasn’t made right so a poor intern received the tongue lashing of life. When she started tearing up, he told her to grow a thicker skin. The other day he wouldn’t come out of his trailer because he didn’t get his cappuccino. Word is he sulks for an hour if people don’t fall over themselves quickly or often enough over his sense of humour resulting in much prompting and reminding by assistants to overtly applaud his brilliance. And despite the fact that everyone was initially stoked to work with a local legend, he has, at one time or another, mistreated the entire crew so badly, they are eager to start selling him out.
Wonder how long it’ll take them to figure out he likes boys?
The UnFunny Douche: an update
http://www.laineygossip.com/The_UnFunny_Douche_an_update.aspx
A hometown disappointment continues to disappoint with his ridiculous behaviour and outrageous demands. Still shooting his new movie close to home, apparently he has to wear some kind of prosthetic or padding that makes him hot and is obsessed with trying to cool down. Five personal AC units were installed in his “personal cooling tents” to keep him from overheating and it still wasn’t enough. Crazier still, the tents have to be pre-cooled to await his arrival which is never pre-determined so he had production completely halted for an entire day very recently just to discuss the tent/AC situation, extracting a promise from the crew to have his itinerary and his immediate whereabouts constantly communicated to the “personal cooling tents” so that they can be at exact chill temperatures when he enters.
Longtime fans are shaking their heads at the bizarre antics that don’t seem to be coming to an end. He’s also supposedly pulled out the old favourite – no looking at him without asking for permission. And around town he’s even worse. Many fans who’ve approached in public places for autographs have not only been rudely rebuffed, they’ve pretty much all been told off. But of course he won’t deign to do it himself. He simply looks away and motions for his minion to tell the admirer that he can’t be bothered to talk.
I’m telling you, of all the tips I’ve ever received about celebrity douches on set, he is by far the worst. Ironically enough, even worse than the Alba Demon.
Primadonna bitch is shooting a movie in Toronto and amazing people with his demands. First he refused to be driven in a limo to the set an hour away and demanded to be helicoptered there instead by his production company. Then his coffee wasn’t made right so a poor intern received the tongue lashing of life. When she started tearing up, he told her to grow a thicker skin. The other day he wouldn’t come out of his trailer because he didn’t get his cappuccino. Word is he sulks for an hour if people don’t fall over themselves quickly or often enough over his sense of humour resulting in much prompting and reminding by assistants to overtly applaud his brilliance. And despite the fact that everyone was initially stoked to work with a local legend, he has, at one time or another, mistreated the entire crew so badly, they are eager to start selling him out.
Wonder how long it’ll take them to figure out he likes boys?
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
The UnFunny Douche: an update
http://www.laineygossip.com/The_UnFunny_Douche_an_update.aspx
A hometown disappointment continues to disappoint with his ridiculous behaviour and outrageous demands. Still shooting his new movie close to home, apparently he has to wear some kind of prosthetic or padding that makes him hot and is obsessed with trying to cool down. Five personal AC units were installed in his “personal cooling tents” to keep him from overheating and it still wasn’t enough. Crazier still, the tents have to be pre-cooled to await his arrival which is never pre-determined so he had production completely halted for an entire day very recently just to discuss the tent/AC situation, extracting a promise from the crew to have his itinerary and his immediate whereabouts constantly communicated to the “personal cooling tents” so that they can be at exact chill temperatures when he enters.
Longtime fans are shaking their heads at the bizarre antics that don’t seem to be coming to an end. He’s also supposedly pulled out the old favourite – no looking at him without asking for permission. And around town he’s even worse. Many fans who’ve approached in public places for autographs have not only been rudely rebuffed, they’ve pretty much all been told off. But of course he won’t deign to do it himself. He simply looks away and motions for his minion to tell the admirer that he can’t be bothered to talk.
I’m telling you, of all the tips I’ve ever received about celebrity douches on set, he is by far the worst. Ironically enough, even worse than the Alba Demon.
Thursday, September 27, 2007 at 6:23:17 AM
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