PPS. The Unfunny Douche Unfunny Douche is not Jim Carrey. Jim is not gay. Jim is not green.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
PPS. The Unfunny Douche Unfunny Douche is not Jim Carrey. Jim is not gay. Jim is not green.
PPS. The Unfunny Douche Unfunny Douche is not Jim Carrey. Jim is not gay. Jim is not green.
http://www.laineygossip.com/Jessica_Biels_publicist_explains_why_one_of_her_pit_bulls_died.aspx
Here’s Shelf Ass walking her dog outside the Staples Centre the other day while Pip was presumably inside pre-performance. Like she'd ever miss a moment of his show, being his biggest fan, surely she wouldn’t stand to be deprived of even a minute of staring at him adoringly, thankful and appreciative …after all, he pretty much gave her her career.
Again, this girl is a Stage 5 clinger.
But at least she’s a responsible dog owner, right? Making sure to walk her baby before the show, doing it herself and not leaving the job to an assistant, unavoidably running in to these bad, bad intrusive photographers who just happened to be there to capture her canine devotion…especially since her publicist just released a rather curious statement.
You see, Celebrity Dog Watcher contacted Jessica Biel’s brilliant rep asking for the whereabouts of her OTHER dog. Jessica had 2 you see – two pit bulls – and now, obviously, only one remains. Rumour has it, one died. So what happened?
Here’s the official statement as provided to Celebrity Dog Watcher:
Thank you for contacting us, the story you have posted is not accurate. Tevy was Jessica’s younger dog that she adopted over six months ago. Last month Tevy suffered an unfortunate accident when she was playing with a group of dogs. No one was around to witness exactly what happened, and sadly she died later that day at a veterinary hospital. From one dog lover to another, we thank you for your concern and for thinking of her during this difficult time.
Coincidence or conspiracy?
Do you smell what I smell?
Yes.
Bull. F&cking. Shit.
Thanks Lauren!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Here’s Shelf Ass walking her dog outside the Staples Centre the other day while Pip was presumably inside pre-performance. Like she'd ever miss a moment of his show, being his biggest fan, surely she wouldn’t stand to be deprived of even a minute of staring at him adoringly, thankful and appreciative …after all, he pretty much gave her her career.
Again, this girl is a Stage 5 clinger.
But at least she’s a responsible dog owner, right? Making sure to walk her baby before the show, doing it herself and not leaving the job to an assistant, unavoidably running in to these bad, bad intrusive photographers who just happened to be there to capture her canine devotion…especially since her publicist just released a rather curious statement.
You see, Celebrity Dog Watcher contacted Jessica Biel’s brilliant rep asking for the whereabouts of her OTHER dog. Jessica had 2 you see – two pit bulls – and now, obviously, only one remains. Rumour has it, one died. So what happened?
Here’s the official statement as provided to Celebrity Dog Watcher:
Thank you for contacting us, the story you have posted is not accurate. Tevy was Jessica’s younger dog that she adopted over six months ago. Last month Tevy suffered an unfortunate accident when she was playing with a group of dogs. No one was around to witness exactly what happened, and sadly she died later that day at a veterinary hospital. From one dog lover to another, we thank you for your concern and for thinking of her during this difficult time.
Coincidence or conspiracy?
Do you smell what I smell?
Yes.
Bull. F&cking. Shit.
Thanks Lauren!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Dog_Eat_Dog.aspx
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4
One after another – celebrity dog scandals. This one is extremely upsetting.
Miss Bottom had two. Both of the same fierce breed. They say of this breed that they should never be left alone together. That inevitably only one will remain.
And this is what happened recently. One ate the other. The other is gone. Killed. Seeing as she has such a wonderful publicist however, this tragedy likely won’t see the light of day.
But every dog owner will tell you – they are like our children. We are responsible for our children. We are responsible for making sure they are safe.
Clearly her dogs were not safe. Clearly she was too busy publicising a romance rather than prioritising her pet.
Douche.
Thursday, September 13, 2007 at 4:28:35 PM
Update (11/25/08):reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4
http://www.laineygossip.com/Mike_Myers_acts_like_a_diva_on_the_set_of_The_Love_Guru.aspx
No seriously…
Mike Myers. Like…do you care? Do you really?
So he’s made a few funny movies but is Mike Myers, on the Hollywood fame scale, is he really a two assistant, can’t hold his own water bottle kind of guy??? Is he really?
Because apparently HE thinks he is. The NY Daily News is reporting that Mike walks around like a king on the set of The Love Guru flanked always by two male assistants (you don’t say???). One minion holds an umbrella and the other is armed at the ready with a water bottle and a straw to be pointed at the direction of Mike’s mouth so he can sip whenever he needs.
Mike is also supposedly not able to focus with the glare coming off of reflective surfaces – is he a f&cking professional actor or what??? – and so crew members are constantly running around the set with black tape making sure nothing is getting into Mr Myers’s eye. Rather douchey, non? And not very funny either.
But then again…are you surprised? You shouldn’t be.
Monday, October 22, 2007
No seriously…
Mike Myers. Like…do you care? Do you really?
So he’s made a few funny movies but is Mike Myers, on the Hollywood fame scale, is he really a two assistant, can’t hold his own water bottle kind of guy??? Is he really?
Because apparently HE thinks he is. The NY Daily News is reporting that Mike walks around like a king on the set of The Love Guru flanked always by two male assistants (you don’t say???). One minion holds an umbrella and the other is armed at the ready with a water bottle and a straw to be pointed at the direction of Mike’s mouth so he can sip whenever he needs.
Mike is also supposedly not able to focus with the glare coming off of reflective surfaces – is he a f&cking professional actor or what??? – and so crew members are constantly running around the set with black tape making sure nothing is getting into Mr Myers’s eye. Rather douchey, non? And not very funny either.
But then again…are you surprised? You shouldn’t be.
Monday, October 22, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Joshua_Jackson_low_key_shooting_movie_in_Toronto.aspx
Right now – late afternoon in Toronto – Joshua Jackson is shooting his new movie in East Toronto. Super low key. There’s a craft services table, no trailer, no super star amenities, and between filming a scene where he’s riding an old little bike around, he’s been spotting just hanging out with the crew. Actually talking to them. Befriending them. Not ordering them around. Not barking for grilled cheese sandwiches cut specifically into four pieces lest he storm off in a huff and refuse to work the entire day.
Yes. That is the Unfunny Douche who, like Joshua, is also Canadian but seems to have lost his Canadian humility a long, long time ago.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Right now – late afternoon in Toronto – Joshua Jackson is shooting his new movie in East Toronto. Super low key. There’s a craft services table, no trailer, no super star amenities, and between filming a scene where he’s riding an old little bike around, he’s been spotting just hanging out with the crew. Actually talking to them. Befriending them. Not ordering them around. Not barking for grilled cheese sandwiches cut specifically into four pieces lest he storm off in a huff and refuse to work the entire day.
Yes. That is the Unfunny Douche who, like Joshua, is also Canadian but seems to have lost his Canadian humility a long, long time ago.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Unfunny_Douche.aspx
Primadonna bitch is shooting a movie in Toronto and amazing people with his demands. First he refused to be driven in a limo to the set an hour away and demanded to be helicoptered there instead by his production company. Then his coffee wasn’t made right so a poor intern received the tongue lashing of life. When she started tearing up, he told her to grow a thicker skin. The other day he wouldn’t come out of his trailer because he didn’t get his cappuccino. Word is he sulks for an hour if people don’t fall over themselves quickly or often enough over his sense of humour resulting in much prompting and reminding by assistants to overtly applaud his brilliance. And despite the fact that everyone was initially stoked to work with a local legend, he has, at one time or another, mistreated the entire crew so badly, they are eager to start selling him out.
Wonder how long it’ll take them to figure out he likes boys?
The UnFunny Douche: an update
http://www.laineygossip.com/The_UnFunny_Douche_an_update.aspx
A hometown disappointment continues to disappoint with his ridiculous behaviour and outrageous demands. Still shooting his new movie close to home, apparently he has to wear some kind of prosthetic or padding that makes him hot and is obsessed with trying to cool down. Five personal AC units were installed in his “personal cooling tents” to keep him from overheating and it still wasn’t enough. Crazier still, the tents have to be pre-cooled to await his arrival which is never pre-determined so he had production completely halted for an entire day very recently just to discuss the tent/AC situation, extracting a promise from the crew to have his itinerary and his immediate whereabouts constantly communicated to the “personal cooling tents” so that they can be at exact chill temperatures when he enters.
Longtime fans are shaking their heads at the bizarre antics that don’t seem to be coming to an end. He’s also supposedly pulled out the old favourite – no looking at him without asking for permission. And around town he’s even worse. Many fans who’ve approached in public places for autographs have not only been rudely rebuffed, they’ve pretty much all been told off. But of course he won’t deign to do it himself. He simply looks away and motions for his minion to tell the admirer that he can’t be bothered to talk.
I’m telling you, of all the tips I’ve ever received about celebrity douches on set, he is by far the worst. Ironically enough, even worse than the Alba Demon.
Primadonna bitch is shooting a movie in Toronto and amazing people with his demands. First he refused to be driven in a limo to the set an hour away and demanded to be helicoptered there instead by his production company. Then his coffee wasn’t made right so a poor intern received the tongue lashing of life. When she started tearing up, he told her to grow a thicker skin. The other day he wouldn’t come out of his trailer because he didn’t get his cappuccino. Word is he sulks for an hour if people don’t fall over themselves quickly or often enough over his sense of humour resulting in much prompting and reminding by assistants to overtly applaud his brilliance. And despite the fact that everyone was initially stoked to work with a local legend, he has, at one time or another, mistreated the entire crew so badly, they are eager to start selling him out.
Wonder how long it’ll take them to figure out he likes boys?
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
The UnFunny Douche: an update
http://www.laineygossip.com/The_UnFunny_Douche_an_update.aspx
A hometown disappointment continues to disappoint with his ridiculous behaviour and outrageous demands. Still shooting his new movie close to home, apparently he has to wear some kind of prosthetic or padding that makes him hot and is obsessed with trying to cool down. Five personal AC units were installed in his “personal cooling tents” to keep him from overheating and it still wasn’t enough. Crazier still, the tents have to be pre-cooled to await his arrival which is never pre-determined so he had production completely halted for an entire day very recently just to discuss the tent/AC situation, extracting a promise from the crew to have his itinerary and his immediate whereabouts constantly communicated to the “personal cooling tents” so that they can be at exact chill temperatures when he enters.
Longtime fans are shaking their heads at the bizarre antics that don’t seem to be coming to an end. He’s also supposedly pulled out the old favourite – no looking at him without asking for permission. And around town he’s even worse. Many fans who’ve approached in public places for autographs have not only been rudely rebuffed, they’ve pretty much all been told off. But of course he won’t deign to do it himself. He simply looks away and motions for his minion to tell the admirer that he can’t be bothered to talk.
I’m telling you, of all the tips I’ve ever received about celebrity douches on set, he is by far the worst. Ironically enough, even worse than the Alba Demon.
Thursday, September 27, 2007 at 6:23:17 AM
Friday, October 19, 2007
PPS. Jennifer Lopez’s BFF is not leaking secrets.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
PS. Ken Paves is not leaking secrets.
PPS. Jennifer Lopez’s BFF is not leaking secrets.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
PS. Ken Paves is not leaking secrets.
Monday, October 29, 2007
PPS. Colin Farrell doesn’t need you to put it there, although if he asked, I totally would.
Friday, October 26, 2007
PPPS. Ryan Gosling does NOT have finger obsessions.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
PPPS. George Clooney does not like it there, at least not that I know of…
PPS. Colin Farrell doesn’t need you to put it there, although if he asked, I totally would.
Friday, October 26, 2007
PPPS. Ryan Gosling does NOT have finger obsessions.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
PPPS. George Clooney does not like it there, at least not that I know of…
http://www.laineygossip.com/Where_To_Put_It.aspx
Warning – this is dirty and crass and, for some, not very appetising. So if you are the prudish type, prone to huffing and puffing your sanctimony through your nose…stop reading now. Otherwise, save your indignant emails. You’ve been cautioned.
Warning – this is dirty and crass and, for some, not very appetising. So if you are the prudish type, prone to huffing and puffing your sanctimony through your nose…stop reading now. Otherwise, save your indignant emails. You’ve been cautioned.
He is hot and hirsute and horny, has had a varied career spanning television and big budget Hollywood productions but has preferred of late to stick with indie fare. Currently single and while there may be many reasons why – his romantic requests regarding the finger could have something to do with it.
A while back he was seeing a girl, a waitress, of course, not terribly serious but they were booty calling regularly to her delight until he became rather “obsessed” – a direct quote – with where he wanted her to put her finger.
Turns out he enjoys being stimulated in that dark orifice and eventually, although she takes great pleasure in starf&cking, using her digits so creatively became too much for even her to bear. And so she broke things off…which is why he prefers to pay for it now since he knows his particular predilection skews to the kinky side.
I know it’s not ladylike to talk of such things but my gays say it really is the most stimulating thing ever. Yet another reason why homos are that much more evolved.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007 at 9:59:03 AM
Update (7/18/08):
clue
denials: George Clooney, Ryan Gosling & Colin Farrell
guess 1
guess 2
reveal
http://www.laineygossip.com/Secrets_from_the_BFF.aspx
Old gossip now leaking, courtesy of her BFF – in whose chair she sat after her split, receiving therapy and getting pretty at the same time. That’s what friends are for.
Only lately her BFF is getting tired of her attitude problem – friendship is apparently on her terms and the BFF is treated alternately as servant and confidante. So since the BFF can be as catty as they come, secrets are starting seep, shedding light on several mysteries, including weight, children, and heartbreak, all pointing to one cause.
Male hormones???
According to the BFF, she took male hormones as a way to stay thin. As a result, she miscarried at least once, which is what resulted in the big break – she lost love because she was obsessed with being skinny…so says the BFF. The BFF also confirms that she has since stopped, which is why her body is back to lovely.
Still…her reputation, or her looks for that matter, won’t be lovely for long if BFF keeps yapping. In many ways, in one very critical way, she needs her buddy more than her buddy needs her.
Update (09/28/10):
denial 1 & 2: Ken Paves & Jennifer Lopez
denial 3 (Courteney Cox)/reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
Old gossip now leaking, courtesy of her BFF – in whose chair she sat after her split, receiving therapy and getting pretty at the same time. That’s what friends are for.
Only lately her BFF is getting tired of her attitude problem – friendship is apparently on her terms and the BFF is treated alternately as servant and confidante. So since the BFF can be as catty as they come, secrets are starting seep, shedding light on several mysteries, including weight, children, and heartbreak, all pointing to one cause.
Male hormones???
According to the BFF, she took male hormones as a way to stay thin. As a result, she miscarried at least once, which is what resulted in the big break – she lost love because she was obsessed with being skinny…so says the BFF. The BFF also confirms that she has since stopped, which is why her body is back to lovely.
Still…her reputation, or her looks for that matter, won’t be lovely for long if BFF keeps yapping. In many ways, in one very critical way, she needs her buddy more than her buddy needs her.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007 at 2:07:26 PM
Update (09/28/10):
denial 1 & 2: Ken Paves & Jennifer Lopez
denial 3 (Courteney Cox)/reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
Thursday, November 15, 2007
PPPS. Mute Stones is not Nicole Kidman. Or Charlize Theron. Those two have won Oscars. But while Mute's family and her husband may be decorated, she herself ...not so much.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
PPS. Demi Moore does not distribute Mute Stones.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
PS. Julia Roberts does not use Mute Stones (Neither does Sharon Stone)
PPPS. Mute Stones is not Nicole Kidman. Or Charlize Theron. Those two have won Oscars. But while Mute's family and her husband may be decorated, she herself ...not so much.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
PPS. Demi Moore does not distribute Mute Stones.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
PS. Julia Roberts does not use Mute Stones (Neither does Sharon Stone)
Labels:
2007,
Charlize Theron,
clue,
Demi Moore,
it's not...,
Julia Roberts,
Nicole Kidman,
Sharon Stone
http://www.laineygossip.com/Last_Word_for_Thursday_July_06_2006.aspx
She is not Julia Roberts. Julia might be doing the arty thing on Broadway these days but I'd say she still owns showbiz the way few actresses can. Besides, Julia is a mega movie star. Unlike Ms Belle who has never been and will never be. Oddly enough, they do have something in common - with one multiple difference.
Kim Basinger? Great guess but off target. Much less marital drama, minus the egomaniacal partner.
Belle is also not Sarah Ferguson, former wife of one of those royals, I can never tell them apart but the fellow who looks much more immunised and robust than the other limp-ish sickly one. Anyway, you're looking for someone on the other side of the pond.
And finally, you can cross out Ashley Judd, although Ashley’s certainly not a stranger to the bossy game, is she? I won't gloat here but I'm tempted. Stay here though…you’re warm.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
She is not Julia Roberts. Julia might be doing the arty thing on Broadway these days but I'd say she still owns showbiz the way few actresses can. Besides, Julia is a mega movie star. Unlike Ms Belle who has never been and will never be. Oddly enough, they do have something in common - with one multiple difference.
Kim Basinger? Great guess but off target. Much less marital drama, minus the egomaniacal partner.
Belle is also not Sarah Ferguson, former wife of one of those royals, I can never tell them apart but the fellow who looks much more immunised and robust than the other limp-ish sickly one. Anyway, you're looking for someone on the other side of the pond.
And finally, you can cross out Ashley Judd, although Ashley’s certainly not a stranger to the bossy game, is she? I won't gloat here but I'm tempted. Stay here though…you’re warm.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=4166
Now here's a bitch who needs a slap to Sunday.
Sure, she's rich. But in a town that only celebrates your recent success, what gives her the right to throw her sh*t around? Especially when the glory decade has long since wrapped?
A while back, when she had reason to self celebrate, she came home to inform her hardworking personal chef that she had invited several guests over for dinner. With only just a few hours lead, the employee was required to whip up something elegant and delicious, something she accomplished in spades. Hoping for a word of encouragement or at least an expression of gratitude, the unfortunate minion greeted her boss the next day, asking her how things went, how she was feeling. And this is what she got in return:
'I really wish you wouldn't talk to me', followed by heavy footsteps out of the kitchen.
Nice.
Cut to present day, and apparently the assy manners are still in tact.
She's scheduled for a promotional product appearance and a driver is sent to pick her up. She gets in the car, he gets her settled, and politely asks her how she's finding everything, if she's comfortable, how she's enjoying the weather. And you know what she said?
'What gives you the idea that I want you to talk to me'. Cue very loud exhale and the silent treatment the rest of the way.
Now I know this shouldn't be shocking considering the clientele we're dealing with but when you're brought up to exude charm and grace, how is this anywhere near acceptable? And you wonder why snarky celebrity gossip blogs are popping up all over the place???
Now here's a bitch who needs a slap to Sunday.
Sure, she's rich. But in a town that only celebrates your recent success, what gives her the right to throw her sh*t around? Especially when the glory decade has long since wrapped?
A while back, when she had reason to self celebrate, she came home to inform her hardworking personal chef that she had invited several guests over for dinner. With only just a few hours lead, the employee was required to whip up something elegant and delicious, something she accomplished in spades. Hoping for a word of encouragement or at least an expression of gratitude, the unfortunate minion greeted her boss the next day, asking her how things went, how she was feeling. And this is what she got in return:
'I really wish you wouldn't talk to me', followed by heavy footsteps out of the kitchen.
Nice.
Cut to present day, and apparently the assy manners are still in tact.
She's scheduled for a promotional product appearance and a driver is sent to pick her up. She gets in the car, he gets her settled, and politely asks her how she's finding everything, if she's comfortable, how she's enjoying the weather. And you know what she said?
'What gives you the idea that I want you to talk to me'. Cue very loud exhale and the silent treatment the rest of the way.
Now I know this shouldn't be shocking considering the clientele we're dealing with but when you're brought up to exude charm and grace, how is this anywhere near acceptable? And you wonder why snarky celebrity gossip blogs are popping up all over the place???
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Update (10/12/10):
clue
denial 1: Julia Roberts, Kim Basinger, Sarah Ferguson & Ashley Judd
denial 2: Sarah Jessica Parker, Meg Ryan & Catherine Zeta Jones
denial 3: Farrah Fawcett, Suzanne Sommers, Andie McDowell, Michelle Pfeiffer, Sharon Stone, Calista Flockhart, Brooke Shields
denial 4: Heather Locklear
denial 5: Sarah Michelle Gellar
denial 6: Kelly Preston
reveal 1
reveal 2
clue
denial 1: Julia Roberts, Kim Basinger, Sarah Ferguson & Ashley Judd
denial 2: Sarah Jessica Parker, Meg Ryan & Catherine Zeta Jones
denial 3: Farrah Fawcett, Suzanne Sommers, Andie McDowell, Michelle Pfeiffer, Sharon Stone, Calista Flockhart, Brooke Shields
denial 4: Heather Locklear
denial 5: Sarah Michelle Gellar
denial 6: Kelly Preston
reveal 1
reveal 2
The bitchery of Courteney Cox continued
Text Harassment
Text Harassment
http://www.laineygossip.com/Last_Word_for_Thursday_July_06_2006.aspx
And finally, you can cross out Ashley Judd, although Ashley’s certainly not a stranger to the bossy game, is she? I won't gloat here but I'm tempted. Stay here though…you’re warm.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
And finally, you can cross out Ashley Judd, although Ashley’s certainly not a stranger to the bossy game, is she? I won't gloat here but I'm tempted. Stay here though…you’re warm.
Thursday, July 6, 2006
http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleDetail.aspx?ID=2630
Her husband would be shocked to learn how she behaves when he’s not home. Because on the outside, she is “supposedly” erudite, and classy, and goes on about being well mannered and respectful, but when she’s alone, without the eyes and ears of an audience, in the presence of only her household employees, this not so ladylike lady is a slob of the worst kind. But even more than this – she is mean, she is rude, and she treats people badly.
If the staff is making too much noise cleaning and dusting or simply cooking for her highness – she thunders down the stairs and puts her finger between the eyes of the offender, threatening termination of employment and a horrible referral. When she’s going through a “fat” day, it is pure mayhem. The breakfast tray that’s delivered to her in the morning gets smashed to the ground and if there are resulting stains from her tantrum, the blame falls on the help.
As awful as this sounds, it’s actually rather pedestrian when you consider what it’s like to work for the rich and the famous. Up to now, it’s been bearable. And then she crossed the line. She likes to smoke, you see. Especially when she’s on the phone. But she hates smoking outside. And she also can’t stay still. So she came up with the following brilliant request: every time she lit up, a staff person was required to follow her around, catching the ashes as she randomly flicked them about the house. Given that this happens several times a day, the other work was getting neglected. And the poor employee was forced to stay late. With no extra pay. I’m sure it wouldn’t surprise you to learn that the staffer quit after a couple of weeks of this kind of abuse. And rightly so. Why does being cheap and badly behaved always go hand in hand???
Again…one guess. Good luck. And it’s not Victoria Beckham.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
More amusing and abusing
http://www.laineygossip.com/More_amusing_and_abusing.aspx
So you already know that she's a legendary slob. And you know about her outrageous housekeeping demands. But it seems our sadistic mistress also has some self image issues. What's new, right? The only problem is, sometimes she can't wait to get to the bathroom before purging her binge. When it's one of those days, the poor staffers can do nothing else but clean up a messy trail all around the house. And dealing with her hysterics doesn't help either. But then again, it is certainly a sight to behold when she pulls it all together in time for the arrival of her husband. Oh, if he only knew…
Good luck. One more guess. Use it wisely.
Her husband would be shocked to learn how she behaves when he’s not home. Because on the outside, she is “supposedly” erudite, and classy, and goes on about being well mannered and respectful, but when she’s alone, without the eyes and ears of an audience, in the presence of only her household employees, this not so ladylike lady is a slob of the worst kind. But even more than this – she is mean, she is rude, and she treats people badly.
If the staff is making too much noise cleaning and dusting or simply cooking for her highness – she thunders down the stairs and puts her finger between the eyes of the offender, threatening termination of employment and a horrible referral. When she’s going through a “fat” day, it is pure mayhem. The breakfast tray that’s delivered to her in the morning gets smashed to the ground and if there are resulting stains from her tantrum, the blame falls on the help.
As awful as this sounds, it’s actually rather pedestrian when you consider what it’s like to work for the rich and the famous. Up to now, it’s been bearable. And then she crossed the line. She likes to smoke, you see. Especially when she’s on the phone. But she hates smoking outside. And she also can’t stay still. So she came up with the following brilliant request: every time she lit up, a staff person was required to follow her around, catching the ashes as she randomly flicked them about the house. Given that this happens several times a day, the other work was getting neglected. And the poor employee was forced to stay late. With no extra pay. I’m sure it wouldn’t surprise you to learn that the staffer quit after a couple of weeks of this kind of abuse. And rightly so. Why does being cheap and badly behaved always go hand in hand???
Again…one guess. Good luck. And it’s not Victoria Beckham.
Sunday, October 30, 2005
More amusing and abusing
http://www.laineygossip.com/More_amusing_and_abusing.aspx
So you already know that she's a legendary slob. And you know about her outrageous housekeeping demands. But it seems our sadistic mistress also has some self image issues. What's new, right? The only problem is, sometimes she can't wait to get to the bathroom before purging her binge. When it's one of those days, the poor staffers can do nothing else but clean up a messy trail all around the house. And dealing with her hysterics doesn't help either. But then again, it is certainly a sight to behold when she pulls it all together in time for the arrival of her husband. Oh, if he only knew…
Good luck. One more guess. Use it wisely.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Labels:
2005,
Ashley Judd,
asshole antics,
blind item,
body,
cheap,
crazy,
eating disorder,
ego,
lazy-as-fuck,
smoking,
staff
http://www.laineygossip.com/Nude_Windows_and_Mute_Stones_blind_item.aspx
She’s kept a low profile, with few new projects in recent years preferring to focus on marriage and on her head. Clearly not enough focus on the head. Because while she’s cleaned up the slovenly habits of riddles past, she’s still as loopy as ever. And still a colossal bitch. Who likes to parade around stark naked in front of her window with the blinds wide open.
In a rented house on a well populated street shooting an upcoming movie on location, she can apparently be seen regularly walking around in front of the windows at the front of the house breasts flouncing around freely, oblivious to whoever might be outside.
It’s too bad she’s not as chill about her attitude than she is about her body.
Yet another star who stalks the set like a tyrant, yet another star who won’t deign to speak to the regular folk. Seems she considers conversation with her a privilege but the honour is granted sparingly and only through “Mute Stones”.
Seriously.
She carries around what people on set have taken to calling Mute Stones and when she isn’t in the mood to converse with someone, she will silently hand over the Mute Stone – those in possession of a Mute Stone are not permitted to speak to her until she takes it back.
Perhaps it’s a trick she can pass on to The Unfunny Douche who fired a dude recently for simply looking at him.
It’s hard to believe, I get it. You can’t believe people are capable of acting so appallingly. But there are two crews over a hundred strong that can vouch for it, word for word.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Update (2/18/12):
denial 1, 2 & 3: Julia Roberts & Sharon Stone, Demi Moore, Nicole Kidman & Charlize Theron
denial 4: Catherine Zeta-Jones
denial 5: Natasha Richardson
denial 6: Renee Zellweger
denial 7: Charlize Theron (again)
clue 1
clue 2
clue 3
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
The Assy-ness of Ashley
Abusing the help
She’s kept a low profile, with few new projects in recent years preferring to focus on marriage and on her head. Clearly not enough focus on the head. Because while she’s cleaned up the slovenly habits of riddles past, she’s still as loopy as ever. And still a colossal bitch. Who likes to parade around stark naked in front of her window with the blinds wide open.
In a rented house on a well populated street shooting an upcoming movie on location, she can apparently be seen regularly walking around in front of the windows at the front of the house breasts flouncing around freely, oblivious to whoever might be outside.
It’s too bad she’s not as chill about her attitude than she is about her body.
Yet another star who stalks the set like a tyrant, yet another star who won’t deign to speak to the regular folk. Seems she considers conversation with her a privilege but the honour is granted sparingly and only through “Mute Stones”.
Seriously.
She carries around what people on set have taken to calling Mute Stones and when she isn’t in the mood to converse with someone, she will silently hand over the Mute Stone – those in possession of a Mute Stone are not permitted to speak to her until she takes it back.
Perhaps it’s a trick she can pass on to The Unfunny Douche who fired a dude recently for simply looking at him.
It’s hard to believe, I get it. You can’t believe people are capable of acting so appallingly. But there are two crews over a hundred strong that can vouch for it, word for word.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Update (2/18/12):
denial 1, 2 & 3: Julia Roberts & Sharon Stone, Demi Moore, Nicole Kidman & Charlize Theron
denial 4: Catherine Zeta-Jones
denial 5: Natasha Richardson
denial 6: Renee Zellweger
denial 7: Charlize Theron (again)
clue 1
clue 2
clue 3
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
The Assy-ness of Ashley
Abusing the help
http://www.laineygossip.com/Hayden_Christensen_rude_to_a_fan_in_Miami.aspx
Hayden Christensen – not the first time I’ve heard he hates his teen beat pin-up status. Poor Hayden. Being famous and all, with a career supported by female fans willing to throw money at anything he puts out there no matter how shit it is – at times it’s really too much, you know? At times it really sucks to be Hayden Christensen. Please feel sorry for Hayden, ‘k?
At the risk of waking the psychotic monster that is the Hayden fanbase, here’s a sighting sent in by a LaineyGossip.com reader who was crushed the other day when rebuked by Hayden, to the point of tears. Rachel Bilson however is the loveliest, sweetest thing.
Friday, August 31, 2007 at 9:21:28 AM
Hayden Christensen – not the first time I’ve heard he hates his teen beat pin-up status. Poor Hayden. Being famous and all, with a career supported by female fans willing to throw money at anything he puts out there no matter how shit it is – at times it’s really too much, you know? At times it really sucks to be Hayden Christensen. Please feel sorry for Hayden, ‘k?
At the risk of waking the psychotic monster that is the Hayden fanbase, here’s a sighting sent in by a LaineyGossip.com reader who was crushed the other day when rebuked by Hayden, to the point of tears. Rachel Bilson however is the loveliest, sweetest thing.
Friday, August 31, 2007 at 9:21:28 AM
http://www.laineygossip.com/Rachel_Bilson_and_Hayden_Christensen_Awake_premiere_NYC_.aspx
As for Hayden – well first of all he looks awkward. Second… a bit of a glassy eye situation here, non? If you’ve been checking the site every day, this probably doesn’t surprise you.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
As for Hayden – well first of all he looks awkward. Second… a bit of a glassy eye situation here, non? If you’ve been checking the site every day, this probably doesn’t surprise you.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
http://www.laineygossip.com/Dating_a_Douche.aspx
Perfect young couple: beautiful and cute, comparable status, first colleagues now lovers trying to stay out of the spotlight. At first, she was charmed by his charm, thought that she had found someone less brooding than her last boyfriend, someone less complicated, with fewer issues. Problem is, the honeymoon phase is over, and as is often the case when dating al narcissistic whiney bitches, their life has become completely about him – what he wants to do, who he wants to see, and what he wants to use.
It was cocaine last year – an addiction he managed to get under control rather quickly. But plagued by professional setbacks and self doubt, he started using recreationally again a few months ago, escalating now to the point where he has become surly and grumpy, alienating many of his own friends and isolating her from hers. Although she is not doing it with him, she is giving up her other relationships to be with him. Her once close group of girls has been pushed out of her life, she hardly sees them, she hardly calls, and she makes excuses when she’s with him, ignoring pleas from her confidantes to slow things down.
Worse still, it’s beginning to affect her work. She has been loathe to accept offers without checking with him first… and his response? “But I want us to be together, baby”. Apparently his cheese is as bad as his acting.
Friday, August 31, 2007 at 7:34:26 AM
Update (7/11/08):
clue
reveal
More about Hayden Christensen
Drugs, drugs everywhere
Perfect young couple: beautiful and cute, comparable status, first colleagues now lovers trying to stay out of the spotlight. At first, she was charmed by his charm, thought that she had found someone less brooding than her last boyfriend, someone less complicated, with fewer issues. Problem is, the honeymoon phase is over, and as is often the case when dating al narcissistic whiney bitches, their life has become completely about him – what he wants to do, who he wants to see, and what he wants to use.
It was cocaine last year – an addiction he managed to get under control rather quickly. But plagued by professional setbacks and self doubt, he started using recreationally again a few months ago, escalating now to the point where he has become surly and grumpy, alienating many of his own friends and isolating her from hers. Although she is not doing it with him, she is giving up her other relationships to be with him. Her once close group of girls has been pushed out of her life, she hardly sees them, she hardly calls, and she makes excuses when she’s with him, ignoring pleas from her confidantes to slow things down.
Worse still, it’s beginning to affect her work. She has been loathe to accept offers without checking with him first… and his response? “But I want us to be together, baby”. Apparently his cheese is as bad as his acting.
Friday, August 31, 2007 at 7:34:26 AM
Update (7/11/08):
clue
reveal
More about Hayden Christensen
Drugs, drugs everywhere
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