Doing it through the underwear hole

http://www.laineygossip.com/Doing-it-through-the-underwear-hole-blind-riddle/28192

Inexplicably, he’s been linked to some really hot, pretty famous women, even though he’s not exactly hot and he behaves, at least artistically, like a douchebag. What’s the attraction? Certainly not his sex moves. This won’t solve the mystery either.

When it’s time to f-ck, he doesn’t like doing it at home. Which is weird because, well, he’s really weird about germs and touching. And you’d think his house would be cleaner than a hotel, right? So he and whoever he’s about to do it with are at the hotel. They’re about to do it. Only he won’t take his clothes off. Instead, he’ll always keep his underwear on, looping his dick through the boxer hole so as to minimise as much skin-on-skin contact as possible.

Maybe that’s why it never lasts?

September 30, 2013 at 5:51 AM

Update (3/9/15):
clue

Doing it through the underwear hole

She lost the cover

http://www.laineygossip.com/She-lost-the-cover-blind-riddle/27956

It’s an opportunity that’s been withheld from some of the most famous women in the world. It’s considered a major honour – to make the cover, THAT cover, a cover her predecessors had achieved and one that was being offered to her just as she was moving forward with the next stage in her career. It was to be a big deal.

The photo shoot happened. Everyone was happy with the pictures.

And then, well, she did her thing. She did her thing, for several minutes she did her thing, and the world gasped and they gasped and now those pictures, they might not be on the cover anymore.

They’ve told her that they are reconsidering her cover but that she’ll still show up in the pages, just not on the front page.

For prestige, this is definitely a setback. But for sales? And notoriety? And general headline-worthiness? There haven’t been any losses. It…just might be a couple of years before they ask her again.

September 5, 2013 at 7:03 AM

Update (3/9/15):
clue

She lost the cover

Big super secret hookup

http://www.laineygossip.com/Big-super-secret-hookup-Blind-Riddle/27491

There’s a reason she recently decided to flaunt her brand new relationship so publicly. Suddenly she’d found true love behind the scenes? And they were telling magazines about it? And getting papped on holiday in Europe? It was because she was sending a message.

To the major Hollywood player with whom she’d been having an affair for 6 months. Only, at the time, he had a girlfriend. They were dealing with each other undercover. She would travel to see him while he was shooting on location overseas. No one, none of us, picked up on the fact that she showed up in the same city. He was sleeping with both the official girlfriend and the side job and telling the side job that he’d break up with the official one and make her the bonafide but, really, the side job, to him, was just a good f-ck and not a proper escort at the kinds of functions he usually needs an escort for. She continued to pressure him though and when he refused her demands, she showed up with a new man, jammed it in his face – and ours – and very shortly afterwards, he formally ended it with his gf, with a generous send-off.

Now? Impasse. She’s enjoying her summer hookup. And he’s all like, ok, I’m available, you can come to me, or don’t. It’s not like he can’t find a replacement, like, right away. Any woman becomes an instant star as soon as he takes her out. Given that she’s already a star, on a smaller scale, their reveal, should they figure out their situation, would be great for gossip though it could overshadow his work. And he has a lot of it coming up.

July 17, 2013 at 6:56 AM

Update (3/16/15):
clue
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3
reveal 4

Big super secret hookup

What he does in his room

http://www.laineygossip.com/What-he-does-in-his-room-Blind-Riddle/27053

After a series of sh-tty relationships, she thought she’d finally found the one. He says the right things, he wants to be with her all the time, he isn’t embarrassed to be seen with her. And he’s not motivated to do much other than to be with her. Life is not particularly challenging for either of them...but every man needs his down time. Or, in his case, his down down time.

What does he do with his down, down time?

Not sure...exactly.

But you can smell it. You can always smell it from his office. So there’s one blend for when he needs to relax and then something else when he needs a hit of excitement. Which might explain why there are small mirrors on his desk with powdery white residue. Do they do it together? Surely not now, in her condition. But maybe later for a shortcut to skinny.

May 31, 2013 at 9:54 AM

What he does in his room

Deal with the paps

http://www.laineygossip.com/Deal-with-the-paps-blind-riddle/26914

She hates the paps, and she’s been burned by the paps. So now she’s dealing with the paps and is working exclusively with one agency, agreeing to give them photos on a regular basis. The agreement started several months ago when she approached one agency in exchange for information on a paparazzo working for another agency. She wanted names, plates, any details available, presumably in hopes of either legal retribution, if possible, and illegal retribution, if necessary. Very gangster.

The only problem with making this kind of arrangement is that you have to deliver. And if you don’t deliver as often as the paps want, and on the kind of photos that are lucrative, they’ll take what they can get, show up when they’re not supposed to, and that compromises the control she was attempting to secure in the first place. Very Faustian.

May 17, 2013 at 8:12 AM

Deal with the paps

15 May 2013 Smutty Shout-Outs

http://www.laineygossip.com/May-15--2013----Smutty-Shout-Outs/26875

And for Claire who has a bum knee -- I’m sorry about what happened and while I can’t make up a story to get you through your horrible week, I can tell you that there’s a girl who’s pregnant and even though she says she says that her steady is the father, she’s really not sure it’s not one of her co-stars, who sleeps with almost all their colleagues and with whom she used to bootycall on the regular. Depends on what the mouth looks like when the baby comes. Does that help a little?

May 15, 2013 at 6:22 AM

15 May 2013 Smutty Shout-Outs

Nanny Diaries

http://www.laineygossip.com/Nanny-Diaries-blind-riddle/26732

No one wants to work with Hollywood’s most difficult mother. She now has a reputation among child care agencies for being the most unpopular celebrity nanny employer and many now only send to her the nannies on their staff who specialise in dealing with mega bitch moms.

She is surprisingly less organised than you would think, often requesting services with no lead time and expecting to be offered priority treatment. When the nanny arrives, she often won’t speak to the person directly, communicating via her assistant, and often implying that the person isn’t attractive enough, and because of this, may or may not sell her out. Because only ugly people compromise confidentiality, I guess?

She confiscates cell phones. She also demands to go through the nanny’s private messages. After a dinner party once, when she and her friends were particularly mouthy, backstabbing several prominent actors and actresses, she demanded to search the nanny who had stayed late -- without prior notice -- so as to make sure she wasn’t bugged and threatened legal action for no reason. Speaking of working hours, she has been known to require extra time but isn’t willing to pay for it, rationalising her request by blaming the person for an imaginary offensive -- like missing diapers or a bent branch/stem in the garden. Ie. “I notice that the whatever bush over there looks a little trampled. You weren’t careful enough. You are staying an extra two hours.”

She is known to be verbally abusive and impatient. She once watched a nanny pick up spilled baby food all over the floor while tapping her hand on the counter and criticising the person’s physique and intellect as the reason for why it was taking so long. Many nannies in LA, hearing horror stories from their peers, have turned potential work placements with her because they don’t want to bother with the drama.

Not Jennifer Garner.

May 3, 2013 at 12:24

Update (3/9/15):
Denial: Jennifer Garner

Nanny Diaries

Doing it to get her back

http://www.laineygossip.com/Doing-it-to-get-her-back-Blind-Riddle/26311

We were all a little sad, I think, when it was confirmed that they’d broken up. No one sadder than him. But she left him because of his drinking. It was excessive, and with the experience of her last relationship, she saw the signs and opted for self-preservation. In addition to his relationship with alcohol though, he also had an unconventional relationship with sex. Think...Michael Fassbender in Shame. Along those lines. Though he was faithful to her, totally, there are addiction issues he clearly has to address. And he’s doing that now, going to meetings, reaching out to another celebrity in recovery with whom he’s worked, as some of their issues are quite similar. He’s almost a month sober now and, yes, he’s doing it, in part, to get her back which... well... they know that’s not the way, don’t they? A few people close to him don’t think he’s really taking it seriously if he hasn’t committed to rehab. And she can see that too. For her, this is permanent, even though he doesn’t seem to be able to accept it.

March 20, 2013 at 7:53 AM

Doing it to get her back

Mother Issues

http://www.laineygossip.com/Mother-Issues-blind-riddle/26243

She’s a mega-star who started young and seemed to not be affected by the child star curse. Seemed to be. But eventually, that sh-t will find you, even on a delay.

It’s the mother. Though the parents were previously thought to be harmless... the mother now appears to be going full Dina Lohan. The mother has been hitting her up for cash for a while now, the better part of a year. To support her own projects, resurrect her own failed dreams, and her new relationship -- so essentially she’s bankrolling her ma’s midlife crisis. The daughter can afford it, certainly, and if it was just the money, it wouldn’t be getting out, but now she’s being asked by her mother to leverage her own fame and influence for industry contacts and connections. Since she can’t get a meeting on her own, she’s been namechecking her daughter to get in the door, and when that doesn’t work, she’s been pressuring her daughter to step in on her behalf, jeopardising her daughter’s reputation. No matter how hot you are, you don’t want to be known as the girl with That Mother. It’s becoming a concern for the daughter’s management team, as they worry that her ma’s increasingly aggressive famewhoring will undo their own moves in advancing the young star’s career. As you can imagine, it’s a delicate, uncomfortable situation. She is loyal and protective to and of her family. But she cannot deny that her mother may be compromising her professionally and is torn about whether or not to indulge her mother’s demands or look out for herself instead. She’s stressed, and while that doesn’t excuse her mistakes, it does provide some insight about some of her behaviour.

By the way, her boyfriend has been very supportive through all of this, certainly her most reliable source of strength.

March 13, 2013 at 7:09 AM

Update (3/9/15):
reveal 1 
reveal 2
 

Mother Issues

Cold Young Feet?

http://www.laineygossip.com/Cold-Young-Feet-blind-riddle/26113

At a pre-Oscar party this weekend...

He’s young, super hot, and engaged. To someone also young, also hot, and arguably more famous, for now. But she wasn’t with him. Which is why he could focus all his attention on someone else -- a beautiful girl made famous by a franchise who is growing out her hair while his fiancée currently prefers it the opposite way.

They were flirting for a long, long time. All he wanted to do was talk to her. And laugh with her. And it was just the two of them until almost the end of the night. They were close to the last ones to leave. Am told “he seemed waayyyy into her”, so much so that if “(his fiancée) was there, she would not have been happy about it. But he probably wouldn’t have been like that if she was there anyway”.

Better that they figure this out now though and not after the wedding. They say it’ll be a long engagement. If this is how it’s going down though, the engagement might be longer than the marriage. They’re just so young.

PS. NOT January Jones.

February 26, 2013 at 2:28 PM

Update (3/9/15):
Denial: January Jones
reveal

Cold Young Feet?

Exes & Wives

http://www.laineygossip.com/Exes-and-Wives-blind-riddle/25548

Just some personality and colour I thought you might enjoy...

Comeback Kid only dates famous girls. When he and Golden were together, he stepped out on her twice that she knows of: once with a stripper and the other with Pigtails. But even though it’s been years, and she’s well moved on, Golden still has a hard time hearing Pigtails’ music. Her trainer made the mistake of playing it once when they were working out. She demanded that it be turned off immediately and never again while she’s in studio.

While Golden can’t let go of her resentment, Comeback’s wife, the PM, can’t help it either. People assume that it’s his other, more curvier ex, who makes her crazy but homemaker to homemaker, it’s actually Golden who she can’t stand, and has been overheard disparaging, unimpressed with her skills and her ideas, rolling her eyes when her name comes up.

December 31, 2012 at 12:06

Comeback Kid: Ben Affleck
Golden: Gwyneth Paltrow
The PM/Comeback's wife: Jennifer Garner
Pigtails: Britney Spears

Update (7/7/17):
"Pigtails" reveal
"PM" reveal

Exes & Wives

He wants, she doesn’t

http://www.laineygossip.com/He-wants--she-doesnt-blind-riddle/25546

The assumption: that in any discussion about marriage and babies, she’s the one who wants it and would have his immediately if only he’d ask. But he’s the one who wants, or at least is leaning more towards having kids, than she is. HE is the one who wants to start a family with HER. She’s resistant because of concerns about her past health, worried about what that would mean for both her, and her future children. He’s not pressing but they’ve been seeing specialists together, looking into different options, hoping to perhaps be parents within two years, even though no one seems to (want to) believe they can make it that long.

December 31, 2012 at 11:54

He wants, she doesn’t

2 days and 20 years

http://www.laineygossip.com/2-days-and-20-years-blind-riddle/25544

She’s married and they have a child. And these days she’s much more visible -- all over -- than he is. There have been rumours, since they seem to be apart so often, that their relationship has been unstable. Though they’ve recently been seen together, and appear to be happy, he might not feel so secure if he were to find out who she’s sleeping with behind his back, and so indiscriminately.

My sources confirm that there was a boy, a very young, very famous, pop boy with his own fragile love situation who she f-cked for sh-ts and giggles. Just 2 nights later, it was another very famous former pop boy (of sorts) 20 years older who, obviously, specifically targets her small demographic. One night only. Those would be her more famous indiscretions. But they say she’s been cheating all over the place and all the time.

December 31, 2012 at 10:42

Update (3/9/15):
reveal 1
reveal 2

2 days and 20 years

"The Worst Wedding Gift Ever," it's not...

http://www.laineygossip.com/The-Worst-Wedding-Gift-Ever-blind-riddle/24963

This is not about Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds.

October 23, 2012 at 10:45

The Worst Wedding Gift Ever

"The Worst Wedding Gift Ever," it's not...

The Worst Wedding Gift Ever

http://www.laineygossip.com/The-Worst-Wedding-Gift-Ever-blind-riddle/24963

This is a blind riddle.

When Duana got married in July we all got together to surprise her and produce a video of us, her friends, re-enacting her favourite scene from Sister Act 2. When this celebrity couple got married, a few members of their friends and family produced a video too, intending to play it at the wedding. They took to the streets, interviewing homeless people and various other citizens who can barely afford pasta let alone a vacation, to express how sorry they were not to be able to make it to the wedding and offer their well wishes.

This was supposed to be... funny?

Again, let’s stress that the two famous people involved here did not conceive of this idea. And I don’t know yet if it was actually broadcast at the event. Hopefully their family and friends realised it was a dick move at best, and profoundly offensive and disgusting overall. Hopefully they realised they were being assholes, walking around making fun of those who are suffering and hungry. Hopefully they buried it and made a contribution for good, in honour of the happy couple, instead of using the homeless to entertain, while everyone else sipped champagne and ate olives. Hopefully.

Because who needs friends like that? Who needs family like that? Do you believe that the people you spend time with you reflect who you are? And if so, what does that say about these two stars?

This is not about Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds.

October 23, 2012 at 10:45

Update (3/9/15):
denial: Blake Lively & Ryan Reynolds
reveal 1
reveal 2

The Worst Wedding Gift Ever

October 11, 2012 - Smutty Shout-Outs

http://www.laineygossip.com/October-11--2012-Smutty-Shout-Outs/24857

And for Kendra who is hurting -- I don’t have anything on Renner or Poetry Arms but (A) I have been holding back a story about a sexy older movie actor who’s running out of money and has been offered a tv series several times but he thinks it’s beneath him. (B) And there’s one about a girl who got married but disinvited a friend, also former colleague, from her wedding because the friend hooked up with her ex. (C) And one of my favourite stories is about how one of the most powerful, acclaimed actors in the business hates his younger counterpart, even though he chose him to be in his movie, because the younger one is way too arrogant and precious about his talent. Senior refers to him as “the kid who isn’t American but somehow talks like DeNiro 1976 -- f-ck him”. That cracks me up. Does that help at all?

October 11, 2012 at 6:35 AM

A:
B:
C: Ryan Gosling & George Clooney

Update (9/28/15):
#C reveal

October 11, 2012 - Smutty Shout-Outs

"Not a doting mother, not a kind employer" reveal 2

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/24502/Seal-accuses-Heidi-Klum-of-affair-with-bodyguard

Heidi & the bodyguard

Well now this is how they should all behave when they divorce -- with bitterness and barbs over a bodyguard, all caught on camera.

Heidi Klum was papped on holiday with her children in Sardinia. In the photos, she and her bodyguard have their arms around each other. There’s nothing dirty but it was suggestive enough to get people wondering whether or not they’re intimate. And indeed, she’s not denied that they’re involved. Click here and here to see some of the photos. I guess the foot-rubbing progressed to more than just a massage. (Yes, that was a very, very big riddle hint.)

After the pictures with the bodyguard were published the other day, TMZ asked Seal, Heidi’s estranged husband, about her new situation. He replied, ON CAMERA, that it’s too bad that his ex couldn’t wait until they were separated before “fornicating with the help”. Click here to see.

Then, realising that he’d just revealed himself to be a dick, he tried to take it back the next day, claiming that he was misunderstood and that Heidi didn’t cheat on him. Sure. Heidi’s trying to take the high road though and in a statement to PEOPLE explained that:

"I cherish all of the great memories Seal and I created together over the years. Our separation was based on issues between the two of us. Seal has moved on and so have I. My priority has and continues to be protecting and providing for our children."

But that hasn’t stopped her from suggesting to TMZ that Seal’s reaction to whatever she’s up to with her bodyguard illustrates perfectly why their marriage fell apart: because he gets mean when he gets angry and he’s angry and jealous too often. Heidi messaging is also premised on her position that Seal wants her back and if he can’t have her, he’ll take as much of her money as he can get in court. And, as you can see, he’ll keep embarrassing her in public to get his point across. Women find this kind of intensity attractive all the time and I’ve never understood it. You’ve seen it in real life among civilians -- possessiveness as an acceptable accompaniment to love. I can understand its origin in the man, but what is the root cause for condoning it in women?

Heidi returned to New York from Italy and has since been seen with a new bodyguard. It’s not known right now if he’s been graduated to official boyfriend. Attached -here she is with him in NYC last month.

September 4, 2012 at 8:03 AM

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer

"Not a doting mother, not a kind employer" reveal 2

One more couple to mourn

http://www.laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/24477/One-more-couple-to-mourn-blind-riddle

Nothing to laugh about here -- this one we will all be sad about. All of us. Because it’s almost over for them. After rising together and stabilising together and conveniently finding a home together, where you’d think work would be so much easier, and having the babies too, they’re close to formally ending it, and there may be an announcement soon...which, well, if you look at him it doesn’t seem to have affected him physically. Everyone says he really cares about his appearance these days, more than ever, and is looking hotter than ever. Or, as one person put it, “hot all of a sudden”. Emotionally too he hasn’t let on that there’s anything wrong. For what it’s worth, I’m told there was no third party involvement. Perhaps that means it’s amicable, just the end of their story. Perhaps we’ll be more choked about it than they are. As I drench my waffles in more maple syrup.

August 29, 2012 at 3:51 PM

Update (3/10/15):
clue
reveal

One more couple to mourn

"Banned Band" reveal

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/24410/Avril-Lavigne-and-Chad-Kroeger-engaged

As every Canadian cringes...

Come on.

They’re perfect for each other.

You don’t even have to think about it for that long -- Avril Lavigne and Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger make sense. Look at her. Look at him. They finally found each other. They are getting married.

It happened while they were working together on her new album. Oh but you can’t wait to hear those songs, can you?

In an exclusive interview with HELLO! Canada, Avril says:

“He makes me laugh every day. He takes care of me in every way and is extremely attentive.”

And Chad:

“I knew I was falling for her. It was incredibly powerful and something I'll never forget. I feel like the luckiest person alive.”

Here’s the ring:

14 karats.

Of course it is. With Chad, it’s all about the size. It’s only about the size. And the rock star living. Hard partying, trashing hotel rooms, the women (Nickelback fans are something to see, I am telling you), and all that stops now? At the Junos a few years ago in Vancouver, he and his girlfriend/partner at the time had a mega scrap at one of the downtown hotels. THAT is exactly what the life is. And now Avril Lavigne is a part of it.

You know this is a torrid, torrid relationship. In every sense of the word torrid. Like Tommy and Pam torrid. Everything you can imagine TORRID. Sorry... was that your lunch? And now, after just 6 months, it’ll be a marriage. Every marriage begins with optimism. I am very optimistic too. Because these two will deliver. On Good Gossip at its messiest and most sinful.

HELLO! Canada is on newsstands now.

August 22, 2012 at 9:14 AM

Banned Band

"Banned Band" reveal

"Cucumber" reveal

http://laineygossip.com/Articles/Details/24382/Diane-Kruger-and-Joshua-Jackson-spend-time-with-his-sister-and-niece-in-Vancouver

Joshua Jackson is in Vancouver shooting Fringe. The weather has been great the last few weeks, finally. June was awful. July was sh-t too. So he was leaving for LA every chance he could. Because, frankly, Vancouver wasn’t offering much of a summer for a while. Now that August is beautiful though, he’s staying and so is his girlfriend. Diane Kruger joined him here over a week ago and they spent part of Sunday with his sister and his niece in Kitsilano, out for brunch at Sophie’s where Diane enjoyed her vegetables. She certainly has a vegetable-enjoying figure.

Yes, I love her bag too. Will ask Sasha.

August 20, 2012 at 9:07 AM

Cucumber

"Cucumber" reveal