"Not a doting mother, not a kind employer" reveal 2


Heidi & the bodyguard

Well now this is how they should all behave when they divorce -- with bitterness and barbs over a bodyguard, all caught on camera.

Heidi Klum was papped on holiday with her children in Sardinia. In the photos, she and her bodyguard have their arms around each other. There’s nothing dirty but it was suggestive enough to get people wondering whether or not they’re intimate. And indeed, she’s not denied that they’re involved. Click here and here to see some of the photos. I guess the foot-rubbing progressed to more than just a massage. (Yes, that was a very, very big riddle hint.)

After the pictures with the bodyguard were published the other day, TMZ asked Seal, Heidi’s estranged husband, about her new situation. He replied, ON CAMERA, that it’s too bad that his ex couldn’t wait until they were separated before “fornicating with the help”. Click here to see.

Then, realising that he’d just revealed himself to be a dick, he tried to take it back the next day, claiming that he was misunderstood and that Heidi didn’t cheat on him. Sure. Heidi’s trying to take the high road though and in a statement to PEOPLE explained that:

"I cherish all of the great memories Seal and I created together over the years. Our separation was based on issues between the two of us. Seal has moved on and so have I. My priority has and continues to be protecting and providing for our children."

But that hasn’t stopped her from suggesting to TMZ that Seal’s reaction to whatever she’s up to with her bodyguard illustrates perfectly why their marriage fell apart: because he gets mean when he gets angry and he’s angry and jealous too often. Heidi messaging is also premised on her position that Seal wants her back and if he can’t have her, he’ll take as much of her money as he can get in court. And, as you can see, he’ll keep embarrassing her in public to get his point across. Women find this kind of intensity attractive all the time and I’ve never understood it. You’ve seen it in real life among civilians -- possessiveness as an acceptable accompaniment to love. I can understand its origin in the man, but what is the root cause for condoning it in women?

Heidi returned to New York from Italy and has since been seen with a new bodyguard. It’s not known right now if he’s been graduated to official boyfriend. Attached -here she is with him in NYC last month.

September 4, 2012 at 8:03 AM

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer


One more couple to mourn


Nothing to laugh about here -- this one we will all be sad about. All of us. Because it’s almost over for them. After rising together and stabilising together and conveniently finding a home together, where you’d think work would be so much easier, and having the babies too, they’re close to formally ending it, and there may be an announcement soon...which, well, if you look at him it doesn’t seem to have affected him physically. Everyone says he really cares about his appearance these days, more than ever, and is looking hotter than ever. Or, as one person put it, “hot all of a sudden”. Emotionally too he hasn’t let on that there’s anything wrong. For what it’s worth, I’m told there was no third party involvement. Perhaps that means it’s amicable, just the end of their story. Perhaps we’ll be more choked about it than they are. As I drench my waffles in more maple syrup.

August 29, 2012 at 3:51 PM

Update (3/10/15):


"Banned Band" reveal


As every Canadian cringes...

Come on.

They’re perfect for each other.

You don’t even have to think about it for that long -- Avril Lavigne and Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger make sense. Look at her. Look at him. They finally found each other. They are getting married.

It happened while they were working together on her new album. Oh but you can’t wait to hear those songs, can you?

In an exclusive interview with HELLO! Canada, Avril says:

“He makes me laugh every day. He takes care of me in every way and is extremely attentive.”

And Chad:

“I knew I was falling for her. It was incredibly powerful and something I'll never forget. I feel like the luckiest person alive.”

Here’s the ring:

14 karats.

Of course it is. With Chad, it’s all about the size. It’s only about the size. And the rock star living. Hard partying, trashing hotel rooms, the women (Nickelback fans are something to see, I am telling you), and all that stops now? At the Junos a few years ago in Vancouver, he and his girlfriend/partner at the time had a mega scrap at one of the downtown hotels. THAT is exactly what the life is. And now Avril Lavigne is a part of it.

You know this is a torrid, torrid relationship. In every sense of the word torrid. Like Tommy and Pam torrid. Everything you can imagine TORRID. Sorry... was that your lunch? And now, after just 6 months, it’ll be a marriage. Every marriage begins with optimism. I am very optimistic too. Because these two will deliver. On Good Gossip at its messiest and most sinful.

HELLO! Canada is on newsstands now.

August 22, 2012 at 9:14 AM

Banned Band


"Cucumber" reveal


Joshua Jackson is in Vancouver shooting Fringe. The weather has been great the last few weeks, finally. June was awful. July was sh-t too. So he was leaving for LA every chance he could. Because, frankly, Vancouver wasn’t offering much of a summer for a while. Now that August is beautiful though, he’s staying and so is his girlfriend. Diane Kruger joined him here over a week ago and they spent part of Sunday with his sister and his niece in Kitsilano, out for brunch at Sophie’s where Diane enjoyed her vegetables. She certainly has a vegetable-enjoying figure.

Yes, I love her bag too. Will ask Sasha.

August 20, 2012 at 9:07 AM



Who Did Your Eyes?


One of the best pieces of gossip I’ve heard lately. I wish I could have watched it go down. Wait, but now I’ve built it up too much. So I’ll pull it back first: this does not involve sex or cheating or secret gays or garden vegetables which means some of you may find it boring. But it does involve two celebrated actors, super powerful, super respected, neither of whom seem to be particularly vain physically beyond staying trim.

A few months ago, one wrote the other asking for some advice:

Actor A: I was just wondering...who did your eyes?

Actor B: I don’t know, I’ve never had my eyes done.

Actor A: Yeah, ok, sure. Merry Christmas.

And then they spent the rest of the season sh-t talking each other while smiling down the carpets at all the events during the season because one suspects the other of holding out on him for a good surgeon. In Hollywood, you’re never too mature to be pretty...and petty!

August 10, 2012 at 12:34

Update (4/28/15):


"He turned out to be the cliché" reveal


Jon Hamm’s bar moves

No... they’re not all perfect. This is a reality that Twilight fans are trying to accept today.

And for those of you devoted to Jon Hamm...well...

It’s been a couple of weeks for you.

And now there’s more.

The Daily is reporting exclusively that Hamm has been flirty and single-acting in bars and at events in Kansas, Rome, and Brooklyn hitting on girls at a pub there and buying drinks for “every mediocre girl”. Sh-t. Do we need to be so harsh?

Hamm’s long-time partner Jennifer Westfeldt was not with him on any of those occasions.


Can’t a dude talk to a woman without being accused of being unfaithful. Of course. Of course. Not everyone is a pig. Jon Hamm isn’t a pig, is he?

Click here to read more from The Daily.

July 25, 2012 at 9:45 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


Let’s take a break from the Twilight despair to get into some sexual produce.

They’ve been together a while now. They’re beautiful and fashionable and they’ve travelled the world. This sense of adventure extends beyond geography. After so many years, it would appear that these two are still super hot for each other.

At a party very recently, they wandered into the garden. They started kissing, rubbing, grinding. He went between her thighs...with his hands...and an accessory.

A cucumber.

In the garden.

At a party.

With a cucumber.

She enjoyed it.

They didn’t know at the time but there was an audience. When they figured that out they were obviously mortified. They’re a lot luckier than Kristen Stewart though. The evidence in this case will not be published.

July 25, 2012 at 9:41 AM

Update (8/20/12): reveal


We still have you

Jon Hamm attended the To Rome With Love screening last night in New York with his long-time love Jennifer Westfeldt. Oh Hamm. We still have you, don’t we? You won’t wrap your head in a thousand scarves and necklaces and prefer the company of Marilyn Manson over your family, will you?

Never ever once has there been a hint of it with Jon Hamm. Never once the suggestion that he steps out on her. They’ve been together forever, when he was struggling and now that he’s no longer struggling. It’s rare, totally. But it’s not impossible, right? Jon Hamm is saying it’s not impossible?

June 21, 2012 at 1:53 PM

He turned out to be the cliché


Jon Hamm looked bummed out when Mad Men won for Best Drama. Jon Hamm also has a man-crush on Coach Taylor. This is why we love Jon Hamm. Who looked, as usual, very handsome last night. And very chivalrously helped several ladies up on stage. And he loves his lady so much, Jennifer Westfeldt, which is why I wish, I wish so much, she would stop with the nonsense all up in her face. Because whatever she’s trying to fix with all that sh-t, it cannot be fixed with a needle or a filler, and this was the perhaps too-subtle point I was trying to make last week: she is too smart to be fighting it this hard; but a girl who is fighting it this hard, well, that’s a girl who’s probably holding on really, really too tight, right?
One day a few years ago, Antonio Banderas looked at his wife Melanie Griffith and he told her, “I love you so much, only you, and this is why I cannot accept any more plastic surgery because you don’t need it, I will still love you when you stop, I will always love you so please stop.”

Supposedly she did.

I wonder if Jon Hamm will say the same to Jennifer Westfeldt. I wonder if he will tell her that she is bright and talented, that she can write and create, that she is more than just a witless starlet running around pretending to be 25 forever, and that as such she doesn’t have to paralyse her face anymore, because it’s so much more interesting when it moves.

I hope he tells her that every day and she listens. I hope she listens and they make it.

Westfeldt’s Friends With Kids which screened at TIFF last week was just acquired yesterday by Lionsgate. I didn’t get a chance to see it but several of my colleagues did, and LOVED it.

September 19, 2011 at 4:37 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


It was really cute when they were full on making out upstairs at the Grey Goose/Soho House party. This happened before they hooked up with George Clooney and Stacy Keibler. He adores her. He really, really adores her.

But ...

I mean you’re looking at these photos. And we’re thinking the same thing, right? Because in person, seeing her, all of us there were thinking the same thing. The same thing I thought when I watched her on Grey’s Anatomy and if you’ve been reading this blog a long time you’ll have heard it before but for the benefit of those who are relatively new...

Remember when Jennifer Westfeldt was on Grey’s Anatomy and she played the woman with cancer and she was supposed to be sick but in every scene her skin was rosy and glowing and the picture of health? That made me crazy. And, well, seeing her in person, several times now, you realise some things are hard to make OVER, you know what I mean?

Of course, being the bitch ass gossips that we are, the logical next part of this discussion is who he is now, and who she is now, and how f-cking hard that must be and if it’s not actually hard, how f-cking awful it is that everyone just makes that assumption.

Having said that, how accurate is the assumption?

The common observation amongst many of us seeing them this weekend as they promoted Friends With Kids at TIFF was that she seemed...clingy. Courtney Shea, the VISA TIFF Insider called her a drag. Click here to read Courtney’s encounter with Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt on Saturday night. I disagree with Courtney about Hamm’s height. His height is fine. But on the drag part...? Maybe a little. And this worries me for them. Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me I’m wrong. Give me another way to see it. I am asking you for serious.

September 12, 2011 at 6:52 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


"Thin For Nothing" reveal 2


Need some comic relief this Monday morning? You can thank Ashley Greene for it. This item appeared in the NY Post yesterday. I’ve decided to include the entire article for maximum amusement:

Greene is really about to be the color of money.
For the past four years, “Twilight” siren Kristen Stewart needed a garlic necklace of her own to avoid the immense amount of press requests and fashion houses longing to pin her face to their hot campaigns.
Now the quiet bloodsucker in the background, Ashley Greene, is getting top billing. She’s currently gracing the cover of Cosmopolitan’s “Hot Issue” after landing on the front of Lucky, Women’s Health and a handful of other titles.
“[Stewart] is no longer the poster girl for ‘Twilight.’ The industry has fallen in love with Greene, who is being hunted down by producers for several upcoming roles,” an insider says.
Greene is about to really cash in with three new films including the much-buzzed “CBGB,” on the New York punk scene and the venerable club.
Execs at major fashion houses are drooling over her upcoming fall DKNY Jeans campaign.
“Prada is one of many ready to pony up far more than the standard $20 million payday to land [Greene],” our source said. And all this before the last installment of "Twilight" hits theaters in mid-November.--

Joseph Barracato was the poor writer assigned to that story. I wonder if he didn’t have to self-medicate to get through it. For the entertainment reporter there are those days - and I know them well - when you have to fight the urge to say to your editor/producer “Please, God, no, do I have to?” Then you close your eyes and accept your fate. No one will remember, right? No one will blame me, right?

No, Joseph, we don’t blame you.

We blame no one.

Because this sh-t, this sh-t is FUNNY.

Ashley Greene is about to dethrone Kristen Stewart??? The same Kristen Stewart who just won the box office this summer with a non-Twilight film and is about to claim yet another mega money franchise all while somehow maintaining her small movie credibility - that Kristen Stewart? Kristen Stewart can get any meeting she wants to in Hollywood, no problem. Ashley Greene couldn’t f-ck her way into most meetings, let alone the kind of meetings Stewart takes, and does, but only discriminately. Kristen Stewart doesn’t have to stop eating.

I know there are those of you who aren’t enamoured with Stewart. Fine. I get that. But like her or not, you are also not an idiot. You know that right now, by the Hollywood grading system, it doesn’t get higher than Kristen Stewart. She currently lives in the penthouse with Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrence. No doubt you find both of them more agreeable.

In other words, this mentally unstable New York Post article is trying to tell you that Ashley Greene, a third tier Twilight cast member who “dated” a Jonas Vagina Virgin, is synonymous with Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrence.


Ashley Greene, bless her, she won’t stop trying. If she can’t stop embarrassing herself, why shouldn’t we continue to enjoy it?

Here she is at Comic-Con the other day dressed for a tea party. Am also throwing in some shots of her with that other loser Kellan Lutz because, well, no matter how hard they want to escape each other, this is where they’ll always exist - side by side, B+ max forever.

July 16, 2012 at 11:10

Thin For Nothing


I want to eat ice cream on a bench, any bench anywhere, but especially in New York, with Mark Ruffalo any time. Even in winter. Even when it’s raining. Whatever. I’m there. It would crush me if he were the cliché. But he’s not. So we have nothing to worry about.

The thing about Mark Ruffalo is that he makes even the non-gushy girls gushy. Duana is not a gushy girl. She’s not prone to crushing and writing imaginary meet-cute screenplays about Ryan Gosling or whatever. Bring the conversation around to Mark Ruffalo however and her voice goes up, almost squeaky. Last week we were on a conference call and she was all business and then Mark Ruffalo somehow came up and Duana allowed herself to be distracted. She may have even giggled. That’s Mark Ruffalo.

Look at him with his slouchy t-shirt and rumpled hair, greying all over, matching his beard. And then that voice...

Oh God.

Wait. There are a few of you out there, more than a few, who aren’t convinced right?

Please. Watch. Watch him commit to that conversation with his hand on his face holding an imaginary phone! Come on! (I’ve now just killed Duana’s entire day.)

July 19, 2012 at 11:55

He turned out to be the cliché


"He turned out to be the cliché," it's not...


(Lainey: RDJ is not the cliché)

July 16, 2012 at 9:30 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


"He turned out to be the cliché," it's not...


Andrea - This is not James McAvoy. Look at him, in New York earlier this week, being so beautiful. Now go back to preventing a pandemic in the EU.

July 13, 2012 at 8:58 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


Stop yelling at me. I gave warning that this would crush you. But why would it crush me if it was Antonio Banderas? It’s not. Or Hugh Jackman which... have I not been clear enough about Hugh Jackman?

July 13, 2012 at 8:49 AM

He turned out to be the cliché


"He turned out to be the cliché," it's not...


Ummm...sorry again about that blind riddle. It’s not Tom Hanks.

July 12, 2012 at 1:30 PM

He turned out to be the cliché

He was the one we trusted who can’t actually be trusted. He used to be my answer to the question - is there anyone in Hollywood who DOESN’T cheat? Yes, I’d say, and excitedly too! Art does not imitate life! He’s faithful!

Well, no. He isn’t.

He hits on the young funny pretty ones at parties. Very typical behaviour - he loosens up with a few drinks and he turns into a pig; two of his more famous targets, both under 30, turned him down. He did however spend a few nights with a frequent co-star, over 30. They’ve worked together on major and minor projects. As for his long suffering partner? The woman we thought was the love of his life? Well, sometimes when he gets drunk and smears himself all over other ladies, she’s actually right there. She turns away. She pretends she doesn’t see. Which... kind of explains why she looks the way she does.

That said, it is a partnership. It’s not like she’s getting nothing out of it. He has used his influence to help her, certainly. Perhaps she’s decided it’s worth it.

An actor cheating on his partner is nothing new and doesn’t make for the most intriguing blind, sure. But like I said earlier, he was the one who was supposed to not be like the others. He’s the one who’s enjoyed almost unanimous popularity. And he turned out to be the cliché. I was surprised about this one. And very, very disappointed.

July 12, 2012 at 10:22

Update 7/25/12:
Denial 1: Tom Hanks
Denial 2 & 3: Antonio Banderas & Hugh Jackman
Denial 4: James McAvoy
Denial 5: Robert Downey Jr. (RDJ)
Denial 6: Mark Ruffalo
Clue 1
Clue 2
Clue 3


"Three Weeks" reveal 4


Christian Bale’s emotions

Um, Christian Bale and Natalie Portman look SUPER HOT as a couple, right? I’m so excited to see him look like himself in a movie - not scowling, not dying, not drug-addicted and emaciated but ordinary, and smiling.

Anyway, about last night at the Movie Awards - in case you missed it, they played a Dark Knight retrospective and included a few scenes with Heath Ledger and then Bale took the microphone and could not contain his emotions.

Needless to say, some of you were all swoony about his public emoting. I’m a dumb c-nt though so, to tell you the truth, I was more uncomfortable than horny. When people cry on tv, or generally in front of a group, my go-to reaction is usually embarrassment. Also people need to stop crying at work.

Where Christian Bale is concerned, I do believe that he is A Sensitive Artist who has no filter. That lack of filter manifested itself in this case on stage at the Movie Awards in a sweet moment of tribute to a fallen comrade. But what is that expression... two sides of the same coin? Kind of appropriate actually when you consider the Batman and the Joker, because that which moved Bale to tears last night is also what moves him to lose his sh-t on set when someone gets in his sightline, resulting in, well, we’ve all heard his rant, right? That infamous rant is the fraternal twin of what happened last night at the Movie Awards. It all lives so close to the surface for Christian Bale. And it all depends where that intensity is directed. For every time he breaks down in tears, there may be a tantrum the next day, followed by a love connection right after.

June 4, 2012 at 2:00 PM

Three Weeks

"Thin For Nothing" reveal


Met Gala Thinnification: Ashley Greene

She’s wearing white Donna Karan. Basically a wedding dress. You’ve seen it a thousand times. What’s new here, or new-ish, at least since last year’s Met Gala, is Ashley Greene’s thinnification. Ashley Greene was always fit. She had a great body. Slim but strong and seemingly healthy.

Somewhere along the way though, as they do in Hollywood, someone must have told her she was “too athletic”, and “not delicate enough”. She’s not the first. To oblige. They are all so desperate for more. And this is the result. The saddest part is it won’t make a difference. Twenty pounds won’t make her Anne Hathaway. Ashley Greene will never be Anne Hathaway. She’ll never even be Jessica Biel.

May 8, 2012 at 8:16 AM 

Thin For Nothing


Anna Wintour presides over this event. Its official name is the Costume Institute Gala. So, as I say every year, this is NOT the Academy. There is no constituency here from Palm Springs to fellate. The people you want to blow are the precious fashion bitches. In other words, the style assessment has a slightly different standard. Save it with the taffeta. Please no ball gowns, no figure skating, no brides, no Oscar de la Renta for the Princess Michael of Kent, and ... no Lindsay Lohan! Anna shut that sh-t down!

At the Met Gala you bring your game. Your game may be considered ugly by some, by the minivan majority, but ugly, here, is better than boring, imagination is better than safe, edge is better than predictable. With all due respect, the fact that you would never wear it is half the point.

I will try to cover as many people as possible. By the end there may be as many as 40 articles, over 8,000 words. So...some will have to be cut. Like I’ll tell you right now, I’m cutting Heidi Klum. Not interesting and don’t care, unless she’s the subject of a blind riddle. But you already knew that.
Are we fighting? We will fight HARD! What could possibly be more fun than to fight over Dress Porn?

(Right now, at 9pm PT Monday night, I cannot find a photo of Andre Leon Talley. What is this world? Every year he makes some kind of entrance on those steps, and sometimes Anna even orders him to arrange her daughter’s dress, a sight I will never forget, along with my friend Lara, the first time we covered the event. This time he was responsible for Beyonce’s walk up to the doors. Will try to update later if new ones come up. In the meantime, I thought you might enjoy this shot of him with Anna front row at Chanel in March. And on the subject of Chanel...where was Karl???)

May 8, 2012 at 6:09 AM

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer


Before she f-cked up and when she could still get a job, Mischa Barton had great style. I loved her style. If you believe that style goes the way of a career though, well, she’s your best example. Like, Bebe looks more luxurious than this dress.

Remember, she is only 26 years old. Same year as Lindsay Lohan actually. Mischa hasn’t tweaked her sh-t as egregiously as Lindsay but... you can still see the hard living. They hard lived together several times. Most memorably once in a limo.

May 4, 2012 at 7:25 AM

Two girls, one limo


Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Julianne Moore went for a walk in New York yesterday. Apparently he’s directing her in a new movie. Scarlett Johansson will also star. JGL worked on the script, a romantic comedy about a player who is trying to commit:

"I wrote myself a helluva role, one that people wouldn’t (have) necessarily thought of me for."

Well he sounds confident, doesn’t he? Yes, actually, he says he is:

"I spent a year working with Chris Nolan, Rian Johnson, Steven Spielberg, and I did my best to pay attention. I've also been making short films for a long time now, I've directed a ton of them, and that is a huge part of why I feel comfortable and confident in this."

For some reason this reminds me of the Boy Sh-t he got into with Michael Cera a few years ago at Sundance. Click here if you missed that. The ones with dimples can be super precious too, you know.

In other JGL news, the final trailer for The Dark Knight Rises was released online yesterday and JGL features heavily. The trailer will precede The Avengers this weekend. In signature Christopher Nolan style, the preview is brilliant and bold, but bleak (sorry about the alliteration), and I am already afraid to see it because that’s the genius of Christopher Nolan - it’s never just a summer popcorn movie; it’s an unforgiving analysis of life which... is obviously never comfortable. 

May 1, 2012 at 9:31 AM

Scared Straight


The ongoing thinnification of Ashley Greene (Popoholic)

April 26, 2012 at 3:00 PM

Thin For Nothing


"She trumps Life or Death" reveal 3

Comment From Noel Beyonce comes across as a genuinely nice person, Gwyneth not so much. Could be that Bey is a better actor.
Lainey: Noel - we all remember that Beyonce makes ambulances when she's hungry in her Maybach, right?
April 5, 2012 at 12:55

She trumps Life or Death


"When she conceived..." reveal 2


Uma decided. And the baby is growing. (The Superficial)

March 26, 2012 at 12:28

When she conceived...

"Scared Straight," it's not...

Lainey: And on that note, Jake Gyllenhaal has nothing to do with today's blind. Bye! thanks for joining us!

March 21, 2012 at 12:55

Scared Straight
Comment From Leslie
Hi Lainey- is dimples Matthew Morrison?
Lainey: Leslie - no

March 21, 2012 at 12:55

Scared Straight
Comment From holly
Can you confirm or deny that James Franco is the "dark guy" in your scared straight blind?
Lainey: Holly - not Franco

Comment From Jenni
Why do I have a feeling that "dimples" would be Eddie Redmayne?
Lainey: Jenni - not him

March 21, 2012 at 12:55

Scared Straight

Both are acclaimed actors. One’s an actor you find super cute. He’s popular and adorable, like dimples and old fashioned dresses. The other’s an actor I find super gross. And dramatic. And full of his own sh-t. He fronts like he’s dark. He’s difficult. The work is often beneath him. The work is often taken away from him because the attitude that it is beneath him is so often intolerable The two had a torrid affair. Which is nothing unusual, of course not. Except that dimples broke up with drama and drama practically had a psychotic break. There was a month-long spiral. A couple of times he came close to really hurting himself. He also threatened to expose them both, though no one is taking that seriously. As a result, his heartbreaker is trying, ignorantly, to go back to the other side of his bisexuality.

March 21, 2012 at 10:46

Update (3/10/15):


Happy 21st Birthday Loryjean with love from Maree who is sorry she couldn’t go to your party but says you two make a “formidable blind riddle-solving team”? Then...you don’t have to check the magazine covers to see who’s Not A Doting Mother, right?

March 9, 2012 at 8:54 AM


Heidi talks about Seal by saying she doesn’t want to talk about Seal (Pink Is The New Blog)

March 9, 2012 at 1:57 PM

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer

It’s not Gwyneth Paltrow.

March 2, 2012 at 8:15 AM

Not a doting mother, not a kind employer

She’s supposed to be the doting mother. Ask the people who help her with her kids. They certainly don’t agree.

First of all she’s never around. And when she’s present she’s distant, not only not involved, but almost irresponsible about it. One of her children may have developmental challenges. As such, diet can exacerbate the issue. Since she can only spend so much time with her children, and often slotted in like appointments in her schedule, she doesn’t bother observing the food requirements that can help with the child’s behaviour. Mom supplies junk food because it’s quick and dirty so that she can get out of there that much faster. When the kid acts out because of the sh-t he’s just consumed, she’s incapable of dealing with it and takes off anyway.

It’s left then to the staff to raise her family. How does she treat them? Nannies’ cell phones are confiscated at 8am and not returned until 10pm. There’s a trusting and kind working environment, non? Totally encourages loyalty.

As you expect, bosses like this always play favourites. Her favourite? Curiously enough, it’s the bodyguard. He’s been seen rubbing her feet. Of course that had nothing to do with the separation ...even though the foot massages have been happening for a while now.

March 2, 2012 at 8:15 AM

Update (9/4/12):
denial 1: Gwyneth Paltrow
reveal 1
reveal 2



"Thin For Nothing" clue


Second tier no-names

Twilight is a huge franchise. But only Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and maybe Taylor Lautner are now household names. The actors on the second tier are still greeted with a very loud WHO?

Such was the case with Kellan Lutz the other night at the LA New Moon premiere afterparty when he was rejected at the door because they didn’t know him from a Kardashian. Lutz and his massive vain ego did not take kindly to the slight. He lipped off security but still had to enlist the help of the crowd chanting “Let him in” before he could gain access. Ohhhh…shame….

Lutz admitted to the incident on Ellen yesterday but only after telling a story about some man who fangirled him at a spa while he was naked. That’s a dude who should never leave his house again. He was also probably wearing Ed Hardy.

And then there’s Ashley Greene. After trying to upstage Kristen Stewart by dressing like Susan Lucci at the LA premiere on Monday, Greene was in NYC last night and somehow scored herself an invitation to the Tim Burton event at MoMA with Johnny Depp in attendance. Am told by several photogs and a reader called CS who was there that Ashley walked right past the line and… they didn’t know her name. So eventually the paps were all like – oh yeah, you, Twilight girl, let’s take your picture. Then she posed. Like hard posed. Like Posh hard posing.

Too hungry, too desperate. Like that Annalynne McCord without the bent over kissy blows.

November 18, 2009 at 1:34 AM


There’s a new Twilight movie coming out in a month. Just today I received an email from a friend about it (Relax, I’m not outing you, you can read the rest of the article without panicking) and she was wondering if she should go to see it at one of those theatres that will play all 3 preceding movies before the new one. That way it’s 8 hours of Robert Pattinson all at once. I have not replied.

Anyway, in advance of the upcoming hysteria, the faces of the franchise are appearing all over the magazines. This includes the third tier players. Like Ashley Greene who is on the cover of the November issue of Allure...because Kristen Stewart was already committed to something better.


You think Allure would have chosen Ashley Greene over Kristen Stewart? If you said yes, you are wrong.

Anyway, being on the cover of Allure has now given Ashley Greene a major case of the delusions and that gives us the opportunity to As IF her into Supporting Actress Eternity. For some, this is an honour. For her, it’s called Hell. Because in Ashley Greene’s mind, Ashley Greene is a Lead.

During her interview with Allure, Greene posits that she never wanted this kind of attention. That all she wants to do, for real, is to act:

"(Fame is) a double-edged sword. It's amazing to be known, and it's great that there is this audience that wants to know about me. But I'm like, 'I'm going to be known for coming out of the gym rather than [for] what film I have coming out.'"

As IF Ashley Greene has ever made any film that’s worth knowing for when it’s coming out. Take away the number of times she appears on blogs in her gym clothes - As IF people walk around saying to themselves, “Oh that Ashley Greene, I can’t wait to see her in that movie about the girl who marries the vampire”.

Have you EVER heard Twilight referred to as the Ashley Greene Movie?

As for her Twilight co-stars, now, suddenly, Ashley Greene’s on the same level as Robert Pattinson:

"Rob. Oh, Rob. He's very endearing, but you've seen his interviews. He's like, 'Ah, I don't know.... Oh, God,'" Greene bumbles in imitation. Despite poking a little fun at him, she credits Pattinson (she calls him a "phenomenal actor") and the rest of the actors for helping her cope with sudden fame. "All of us essentially were unknown. So everyone kind of went through this crazy whirlwind [together],'" Greene says. "It was really nice to be able to confide in people who were going through the exact same thing."

The same thing? Ashley Greene is the same as Pattinson and Kristen Stewart?

As IF Anna Wintour knows Ashley Greene. As IF Graydon Carter knows Ashley Greene. Ashley Greene could pass Anna Wintour in a restaurant and Anna would ask her for a clean fork!

The same thing?

As IF Kristen Stewart had to date the MIDDLE VAGINA JONAS VIRGIN to get some play, and even then no one cared!

The same way no one cares about Greene’s friendship with Seth McFarlane:

"Seth and I are friends, and he texts me: 'I didn't know that not only were we dating, but we have since been confirmed to not be dating,'" Greene says. "I can assure you that we're not."

Um, I spend my whole day reading gossip headlines. NEVER have I read a gossip headline about Seth McFarlane and Ashley Greene. As IF she didn’t try to create it though.

And As IF she’s Angelina f-cking Jolie!!!

"I'm really happy that she’s doing well," she says of Demi Lovato. The actress also rolls her eyes at the rumor that they fought over Jonas. "She and I never had a problem with each other," Greene says. "But, you know, it doesn't go away.... Jen Aniston still gets asked about Angelina Jolie."

As IF she didn’t just compare her pathetic little non-story to the Greatest Gossip Triangle in the Modern Gossip Era!

As IF she didn’t just give herself the Jolie position in her weak ass attempt to create for herself a triangle situation!

As IF she didn’t just liken JOE JONAS to BRAD PITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is an emergency. It’s a crisis state. When people like Ashley Greene can go off talking about themselves like this and remain unchecked, we are officially in the sh-ts. Occupy Hollywood!
Click here to see more of Ashley Greene in Allure.

October 18, 2011 at 11:59

Thin For Nothing

Tim Tebow was in LA for Oscar weekend. On Friday he hit up a party and met Taylor Swift. On Sunday he went to Vanity Fair and had his picture taken with just about everyone, including, as attached, Jon Hamm and Kate Upton.
But even the excitement of all his new celebrity fangirls couldn’t diminish the effect that Swifty must have had on him because the next evening Tebow met up with her for dinner. At the end of the meal, like a proper gentleman, he walked her out before heading back inside to rejoin their table where two companions remained, believed to be their respective agents.

So...they were chaperoned?

That totally means they’re getting married.

But only after a long respectable courtship. That’s why Swifty’s now off for Australia. Good girls have supervised dinners and talk on the phone for a couple of weeks before agreeing to the next date. Unless of course it’s John Mayer on the other end.

Taylor Swift is not unlike Anne Hathaway in this regard. She wants to do the right thing on paper. But sometimes it’s too hard to resist the boys that should be reisted.

If you believe their press releases, there is no one more suited to Taylor Swift than Tim Tebow. And no one more suited to Tim Tebow than Taylor Swift. Tim and Taylor. Taylor and Tim. Just a simple “T” or better a simple “t” for their wedding invitations and their place settings. And the wedding album soon to follow.

February 29, 2012 at 1:16 PM

Three Weeks

This is NOT When She Conceived. Which I revealed already this week. (Dlisted)

February 29, 2012 at 11:46

When she conceived...


"When she conceived..." reveal 1


Uma Thurman is pregnant

Uma Thurman confirmed to PEOPLE yesterday that she’s expecting a child with boyfriend Arpad Busson, nickname Arki. Busson has two children with Elle Macpherson. Uma has two too with Ethan Hawke.

Who is Busson?

He’s MEGA rich. He’s worth almost half a billion dollars. He’s also a philanthropist. His charity recently announced a partnership with Prince William’s. I’m just saying he’s super connected. Uma lives well with him. With her older children growing more independent, it was a jetset, exclusive, indulgent lifestyle. Now, at 41, Uma’s going back to babies.

Did you see those shots of Uma in the last issue of Vogue Italia? I LOVE these pictures. They were taken by Peter Lindbergh - INFINITELY MORE exciting than the prosaic photographs Mario Testino keeps putting out - and meant to remind us that not too long ago, Uma Thurman was that girl: off centre, sexy as hell, enigmatic, unusually beautiful, and also sharp and talented...

Not exactly in line with the current plan. As such, I don’t think she was expecting it when it happened. Still, happy news is often unpredictable, right?

Click here to see more shots of Uma in Vogue Italia.

February 28, 2012 at 10:08

When she conceived...

You’ve figured out the blind riddle by now, haven’t you?

February 28, 2012 at 8:45 AM

When she conceived...

"When she conceived..." it's not...


I hate this dress with a lot of fury. Also she is not When She Conceived.

February 24, 2012 at 2:45 PM

When she conceived...

"When she conceived..." it's not...

Comment From andie
drew barrymore...when she conceived.
Lainey: Andie - NO. Thanks for joining us! Happy Oscars!

February 21, 2012 at 12:58

When she conceived...
Comment From Kate
Thin for Nothing: Kate Upton?
Lainey: Kate - NO.
February 21, 2012 at 12:58

Thin For Nothing
Comment From Suz
when she conceived... cindy crawford/randy
Lainey: Suz - no.

February 21, 2012 at 12:58

When she conceived...

Comment From Jack
When she conceived - Claire Danes?
Lainey: Jack - no

Comment From Brandy
When she conceived-Vanessa Paradis?
Lainey: Brandy - no

February 21, 2012 at 12:58

When she conceived...
Comment From Candace
"when she conceived" -- kate beckinsale? leslie mann?
Lainey: Candace no x 2
February 21, 2012 at 12:58

When she conceived...

Comment From Charlotte
Can you give a hint about When She Conceived? Is she a TV or a movie person?
Lainey: Charlotte - movie. mostly. but... maybe not always and lately.
February 21, 2012 at 12:58

When she conceived...

Have I mentioned that Angelina Jolie is not When She Conceived?

February 21, 2012 at 8:27 AM

When she conceived...

Lower tier actress - you know her name - is desperate for a big(ger) break. When she heard The Director was working on a new blockbuster, she begged and begged for a meeting. And he repeatedly kept dicking her around, cancelling at the last minute, making her wait for a couple of hours before sending the assistant  out to tell her he wasn’t showing. I mean, he’s a legendary misogynist. And there’s nothing he likes more than playing mind games with young actresses.

Though he has no intention of putting her in his movies, he’s having a great time f-cking up her head. So he sent word that he might agree to see her but only if she loses some weight. This girl was fit to begin with. Like really fit. So she’s starving herself to let go of an extra 10, even though there’s not much there to begin with. But it’s not like it would help. Again, he’s just doing this because he can, for sh-ts and giggles, because he’s a twisted f-ck. As he explained to a colleague, “That girl is regular person pretty, and not even really regular person pretty. Definitely not hot enough for one of my movies.” And it’s like he’s almost insulted that she thought she was. Which is why this game, this game is just his way of putting her in her place, of punishing her for actually thinking she’d be good enough, sexy enough, to be his new model muse. He justifies it by saying he’s giving her a “life lesson”. Oh, and “if she offers me a blowjob, I’ll take it. One of these days, maybe I’ll throw her a favour”. Sad part is...she’s coming close to it. She’s coming very close.

February 21, 2012 at 9:44 AM

Update (7/24/12):


"Biohazard" clue


Paz and Pitt are unemployed. Coincidence or conspiracy? (Dlisted)

February 7, 2012 at 11:52

Comment From tamara
Does Charlize use mute stones?
Lainey: tamara - wrong one.

January 17, 2012 at 1:00 PM

Mute Stones & Nude Windows

"Who would want to work with this?" clue

Comment From Esme
So who is more crazy, Ashley Judd or Charlize Theron?

Right Lainey?
Lainey: Esme - not many people are crazier than Ashley Judd. GOD SHE IS A CRAZY MESS.

January 17, 2012 at 1:00 PM

Who would want to work with this?

"They're creeping everyone out" reveal


I could never be a publicist or a personal assistant for a celebrity. It’s not the hard work I’m afraid of; it’s the adult babysitting. They are SO fragile and insecure and narcissistic, it’s an exhausting experience. And, frankly, it can be really, really sad.

I’ve been really hard on Rooney Mara the last couple of weeks for the “aloof”-ing and the SVU trashing. As previously noted, people who are aloof don’t generally point out their own aloofness. People who really, really want to be aloof will try to convince you that they are. In her case, it’s self preoccupation - standard behaviour for an actor - and also, as expected, terrible insecurity.

An article has been published in the Swedish press featuring interviews with some of the local extras and crew who worked on The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. I love Google Translate.

Donald Josephson has a scene with Mara in the film. Here’s his account of his experience:

I have two lines in the film. Lisbeth Salander comes to the computer store that I work in and I said: "Unfortunately, this computer is completely broken. I hope you have a backup. "

I biked to the set. When I arrived expecting a self-trailers, buffets and assistants.

The scene was a real computer shop on Götgatan, which was redesigned and thoroughly equipped with Apple logos.

The most fun was to keep up with Rooney Mara in "The Green Room", the room where the actors wait between shots. To be part of there and hear her anxiety over whether she would be better than Naomi Rapace. She had lots of those "Mirror mirror on the wall" moments in there. Mara asked all the time her assistant, "Did we not do better when we did this scene? Don’t I look better than her? Am I not better? Am I not young? Am I not cool? "And the assistant just replied:" Yes, yes, yes! You are the best, you're the best! "

This ...is pretty much standard procedure. It’s a f-cked up life, the acting business. The promises almost never materialise. They’re repeatedly rejected, and when they aren’t rejected, they are constantly afraid they will be. And so the people around them, they keep telling them what they want to hear. And when they hear it, they either start to believe it, or try to believe it but doubt it, and spend the rest of the time searching for a truth that feels authentic... which, sometimes, eludes them forever. Because in Hollywood, well, does the truth even exist?

Michelle Williams delivers an extraordinary representation of this in My Week With Marilyn. Marilyn’s issues were exacerbated by drug dependency and all that other sh-t she was carrying around with her from when she was a child. But her lack of self worth was not unique. It manifests itself in different ways for different people. For Rooney Mara, there’s the fake aloof-ery and bravado. And of course, you can imagine, under those circumstances, what David Fincher must represent: Creator and God. Everything.

I will be seeing Dragon Tattoo Girl this weekend. All of my colleagues say she’s incredibly compelling. I believe it. Oh but the cost...

Click here to read the Swedish article with more insight from others who participated in the production of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.

December 22, 2011 at 10:37

They're creeping everyone out

Rachel McAdams was in New York this morning promoting The Vow. She was also on the cover of The Sunday Telegraph’s Stella this weekend in the UK. I really wish they chose a better cover shot. During the interview she talks about shooting the scene in The Vow where her character sees Channing Tatum’s character heading to the bathroom not wearing any clothing. It’s supposed to be awkward because she’s lost her memory and doesn’t see him as her husband anymore. Apparently during filming, Channing and the director fashioned a massive prosthetic for him to wear to surprise her in the shot. Tatum still teases her about it. During the junket, he walked in on her room and asked her, “Are you talking about my body?” (Why am I finding him more and more ...likeable?)

As for Rachel’s real life boyfriend, she tells Stella that she and Michael Sheen did not start dating until after wrapping on Midnight In Paris, that they were friends first and then more later. She also reveals that they try not to spend more than 3 weeks apart and that the travel can be challenging; as such she is trying to remember to take things “slowly”, enjoy it without too much pressure. How’s this for pressure? I love them together. I want them to be for reals for ever.

But did you know she turned down The Devil Wears Prada? This is the sh-t Duana and I talk about all the time re: Rachel McAdams. Though she claims that she needed the time off, really, you have to wonder about the management team. The Vow might do very big business from the same people who see Katherine Heigl movies. But does it make Rachel’s career any more diverse?

January 31, 2012 at 10:35

13 December 2011 Smutty Shout-Out

PS. Sienna Miller is NOT the subject of When She Conceived...

February 15, 2012 at 9:33 AM

When she conceived...

2005 Blind Items
2006 Blind Items
2007 Blind Items
2008 Blind Items
2009 Blind Items
2010 Blind Items
2011 Blind Items
2013 Blind Items
2014 Blind Items
2015 Blind Items
2016 Blind Items


She’s pregnant. It’s still early but she’ll start to show soon. And she’s happy, they’re both happy, but also really, really freaking out. Because around the time of conception, they were both using rather frequently. It’s just what they do together. Besides, she thought she was past the point of another child. So it was a surprise, to say the least. A pleasant one, yes, but she’s not sure if it’s one she wants to keep. She is convinced the child will not be right. She is convinced, in her mind, in her words, that she’ll “be paying for it” for the rest of her life, in the form of care and stress, and that this will be her punishment for such recklessness - to be attached to a kid that will need her, in ways she’s afraid to imagine, forever. She’s also super paranoid that if she does have their baby and the baby has health problems, he’ll turn and blame her, and be disgusted by her, and leave her. Without all his access, it’s a totally different life. And ultimately she still wants to be desired, she prioritises being desired. It’s a decision she is agonising over but she’s running out of time.

The good news? The drugs have stopped completely.

February 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM

Update (4/02/12):
denial 1: Sienna Miller
denial 2: Angelina Jolie
clue 1
denial 3: Kate Beckinsale & Leslie Mann
denial 4: Claire Danes & Vanessa Paradis
denial 5: Cindy Crawford & Rande Gerber
denial 6: Drew Barrymore
denial 7: Nicole Ritchie
clue 2
reveal 1
denial 8: Snooki
reveal 2