"Doctor's orders" clue 2


I posted this article yesterday about George Clooney’s new Italian piece and a clip that a reader called Claudia sent me that allegedly shows Elisabetta getting, um, a fellatio facial. The last line of that article read:

How will People Magazine deal with her past? Will they whitewash her resume?

Like 2 hours later, People.com did indeed profile George’s lady. And they made her sound like the most entrepreneurial, successful, well rounded woman ever. Of course they did. Because George Clooney must be sold to the MiniVan this way. I don’t give a sh-t what Canalis did with her mouth. Don’t care about her history. But what’s fascinating is how her history will somehow be repurposed because of who she’s dating.

As for whether or not all this is fair what’s she’s going through – she loves it. Trust.

Now. About that link. It says it’s her. And they say it’s her. But there’s so much – errrr – covering her, Jacek has been researching, watched it a few times, can’t make a conclusive identification except to say the features certainly match, and she’s dabbled in soft core before too.

I’ve received your emails and many of you want to see it. So let me warn you again. It’s LEWD. It’s VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY GRAPHIC.






Friday, July 31, 2009 at 8:23 AM

That’s why she’s the Italian Queen

What’s the big sh-t about Elisabetta Canalis? Why the drama?

Italian police have busted a few local clubs for alleged drug activity and pimping. Some witness testified that she may have used cocaine with the Italian Queen a couple of years ago. That’s pretty much the extent of the story. The Italian Queen used to roll at a shady club for a few rails and maybe f-cked for some cash on the side and suddenly this is news.

This is not news. This is what he likes. He likes it rough and dirty, he likes it not sweet, he pays well but she can’t be well behaved, and definitely not MiniVan. You don’t think he knew? Of course he knew. You have known this for a long time. But the MiniVan, well they didn’t know. They refuse to know.

Several US media outlets have published stories about the scandal including Huffington Post and Us Weekly but curiously enough People.com has yet to address it. What’s Clooney’s next move? Does he cut and run, or does he offer an exclusive in exchange for some whitewashing, and just in time for the release of The American on September 1st? Many are expecting The American to be on the Venice Film Festival list when their lineup is announced. And with Ely by his side, defiantly refusing to release her, keeping her his Italian Queen.

Please. A little drug prostitution scandal isn’t holding back Ely Canalis. A girl with her roots doesn’t get to Lake Como without a little resourcefulness.

Friday, July 30, 2010 at 8:14 AM


Publicly nuzzling the Italian Queen

Pay your f-cking respects. This, golddiggers, is about as solid as it gets. And I wonder now if anything can take the Italian Queen down.

She has endured a cocaine and prostitution scandal in Italy proper that was not only contained and controlled immediately, with no North American penetration, but she’s managed to overcome it even at home, during Milan Fashion Week, flaunting her superior strategic machinations in the faces of her enemies but appearing front row at Cavalli, and then – the ultimate trumping – hand in hand with Him at Giorgio Armani today.

In which he looks delirious. Almost drunk on her love.

In which he nuzzles her for the cameras, happily.

In which he will continue to open doors, offer opportunities, so long as she keeps up the magic.

She makes it look effortless. She deserves the photo caption.

It’s George Clooney who is accompanying Elisabetta Canalis.

Also attached – Roberto Cavalli. Because amazingness will never be denied.

Monday, September 27, 2010 at 11:07 AM

Doctor's orders

They were all on set yesterday shooting a scene in which there’s a pawn shoppe robbery or something – Ryan Gosling, Christina Hendricks, and Carey Mulligan in pink. Really not sure why they keep dressing him like an Elvis impersonator but whatever, when that jacket comes off, there’s not much to complain about. And there’s nothing to complain about when you consider his schedule.

Ryan’s two long-awaited films Blue Valentine and All Good Things (not really crazy about that trailer) will be released at the end of the year. Crazy, Stupid, Love, the comedy with Steve Carell, Julianne Moore, Kevin Bacon, Marisa Tomei, and Emma Stone (who isn’t in that movie???) is due out in April. They’re hoping to release Drive next year too. And as you’ve probably heard, he’s just been cast in George Clooney’s next directorial effort, The Ides of March, based on Farrugut North. Clooney will also star in the film. And you know, Clooney’s films never have to sit on a shelf waiting for distribution. In other words, there’s a lot of Ryan coming up. Given that we haven’t seen him at the movies since 2007, yes 2007, these are happy times.

Friday, October 29, 2010 at 1:51 PM

Doctor's orders

He like his sex unconventional. Some would call it experimental, certainly vigorous, and definitely physical. Maybe too physical. Mixing pain into his pleasure, and cutting very, very close to a dangerous line is taking its toll on his body. He shows up with strange bruises, the next week it’s a minor fracture, his neck has been strained, sometimes there’s a knee brace, the shoulder’s been f-cked up for a while, and his back is a chronic issue too.

The excuse of course is that he’s active, that he exercises, he’s sporty, and that’s true, yes, but the injuries are not sustained while playing pickup, no, not at all. The injuries happen when he’s doing his business with his steady girl, a willing and capable participant.

His doctor is aware of what’s been ailing him, and WHY it’s ailing him. Helps when he can. But he’s been urged to take it easy because lately it’s been getting too rough. Especially with insurance and medicals and all that kind of paperwork, it’s hard to explain away the cuts and sprains, the little accidents that seem to be occurring with increasing frequency. He’s so into it, and he gets so off on it, it’s hard from him to curtail his fun. But they all agree, at least it’s been the case in the past, that when it’s time to get to work, he manages to keep his freak under control.

Monday, November 08, 2010 at 8:05 AM

Update (12/07/11):