Testosterone Tantrums


You think diva behaviour is restricted to chicks? Amateur assumption, right? Especially when it comes to this dude, allegedly tough on the outside, but a screaming beeotch on the inside.
We’re on the set of a recent project. He’s taking a break from a long day of shooting. He’s tired, he’s cranky. He needs to rest. Which is fine. Nothing new in the world of acting. But then came the whining:

“I need a nap! I want to take a nap!” accompanied by foot stomping and baby-like air expulsions accessorized by a lot of head rubbing and even a little bottom lip tremble.

His assistant had to calm him down, rub his back, and make him a hot cup of tea to right the ship before the little outburst came to an end.

The next episode involved a belt. Somehow the one he liked went missing.

“Where’s my belt! I want my belt. Wah. Wah. I need that belt. Where is it? Someone has to find it!!!” At which point his assistant handed him a very similar belt so that he could get back to the set where everyone was waiting. This apparently wasn’t good enough. He hurled the replacement across out the window like a petulant 5 year old and declared, “if I don’t have that belt, I’m not going out there. I don’t care how much it costs them! Find me that belt!” 90 minutes later, they unearthed the belt and we all went back to work. But everyone, everyone heard his wailing, and for all those who were lucky to witness it, there is no way now that they’ll ever believe it when they see him as a so called bad ass ever again.

One guess. Good luck.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

More testosterone tantrums

Every day on the set, craft services delivers a meal to our tempestuous star in his trailer. He likes turkey sandwiches to help him stay lean and a salad with some low fat cheese and as a special treat, he asks for 3 1/2 cookies. Not 3. Not 4. But 3 1/2. Cut perfectly in half. Last week, the caterer preparing his lunch box was in a rush due to the fact that the power feed coming in to the truck had been mistakenly cut. She was rushing all preparations to make sure the food wouldn't go bad, and in her hasty state, she was unable to find a clean knife. Thinking that it wouldn't be a big deal just this once, she threw 4 cookies into the tray and had it delivered to the action hero.

Ten minutes later, she received a visit from his personal assistant with a stern warning about the 1/2 cookie mistake. 'Mr. X wants 3 1/2 cookies. If you can't make this happen we are going to have to find another place to get our food. Do you understand?' Half a cookie, gossips. HALF A COOKIE! I know this sounds ridiculous. And it is. But are you really that surprised???
One more guess. Good luck.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Update (8/23/16):
reveal 1
reveal 2
reveal 3

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